Back Step
by Amber Cloud
Summary: Next Part of the In a Lifetime series. AU. Lexa's VERY evil and she's face to face with the rest of the team. Read and Review with my thanks. I'm back, after a long absence...Chapter 16 is ready for your appraisal.
1. Default Chapter

Backstep

Legal Disclaimer-Alliance Atlantis, Fireworks, Marvel and Tribune Entertainment own these rights. I'm just writing Fanfiction.

Author's Note-Yep. It's another look at Dark, Angsty Jesse. He's been experimented on, and seems to be okay with it. If you don't know what I am talking about, please, take a moment to read the following fic "In a Lifetime". It will explain a whole bunch more. My previous reviewers, I thank you for the time it took to write reviews. This is the more you asked for. I'll try to update when I can, but, after writing the 95 pages that "In A Lifetime" turned out to be, well, I think I might write my own novel. I know now that I can do it. I'll let you know how that process goes, and if I ever wind up publishing it.

Chapter 1

Sunrise. It had become the time of day that Jesse Kilmartin had begun to crave. The light covered the mountain ranges of the Appalachians with the brightest color of pink that he could think of. He had looked at the colors in the hardware store on a trip with Brennan, and wondered if they could ever find that color. As he looked at, he knew it wasn't possible at all. Emma had wanted a pink bathroom that color and he had tried, but finding it wasn't possible.

He took a moment to admire the light from the sunrise then continued with his morning ritual of the kata. The idea was to get the hands, the body and spirit all in harmony to start the day. So far, it was working. He had started doing this weeks ago, Brennan setting up a dojo at Adam's new place, one that they had all dubbed "Haven", since it seemed to be a safer haven from the one they used to know.

He turned and stretched his right arm up as far as he could. The muscles rippled in response, and he felt a cold shiver run down his chest as a morning breeze blew through. He stopped for a moment and pulled on his discarded tank top. The ritual then continued, every muscle working to pull his mind and body together. He worked at it, some days being like old ones where he trusted himself and other days being completely out of it.

Brennan had talked to him about his mindset. He knew that Jesse had been badly shaken by the death of nearly 200 children that he had been linked to by a telepathy that he didn't want. The Creator had saved his life, only to give him telepathy. The jury was still out if it was a blessing or a curse. Some days it was a curse he didn't want. Some days it was a blessing. His friends were learning how to live around him, he also had begun the process of filtering the thoughts of others out of his. Thank God he had Emma. She knew what he was going through and had been the biggest help to him. It had deepened their relationship even further. He knew she would be there for him and once he had more control, he would be there for her.

Pierce was the other thought on his mind. He loved the thought of having a child. When Lexa had told him about her choice to abort Pierce, his heart had been ripped out. She had broken something deep within him, and he knew up to the moment she had admitted it to their circle of friends, it hadn't healed. He could have thought it was healed, he had drunk himself into thinking that it had healed, but, it was slowly healing. That was good. It had made him realize how badly he needed his friends, his surrogate "family" that he had badly missed. He was alone and shielded in his thoughts.

He closed his eyes when he turned, not realizing that he was no longer alone in his solitary pursuit of mind/body unity. Adam Kane had joined him on the outer deck of the Haven. Adam had been silent. He knew that Jesse had been doing this ritual regularly, and had even encouraged it. He watched the pattern that Jesse had followed and mimicked it, knowing the pattern was more for unity than for exercise. Brennan had a stronger body one that he was going to work up to, but he could see this helped Jesse in exorcising his soul.

Adam grunted as he breathed in, his need to release the anxiety that surrounded his days a constant build up. He knew that they would eventually find all of these children, the clones of them would be in good homes and hopefully, none of this lives would be lost like the children were at the Amish farm. He could only imagine what the team of people he worked with had seen, he had feared that the Creator didn't value the children's lives and sadly, he knew now that he didn't.

He lifted his hands skyward. The muscles responded to his daily tai-chi, hoping that the mind would soon find its way back from the wandering it was doing. The mind was soon responding.

Jesse felt stronger every day he did this ritual. Emma had told him her horror stories of when she first wandered into her power, not knowing if she was sane or not, wondering if the emotions that she felt were hers or others, and her fear of large crowds. It had taken everything to get her to a Washington Wizards game, the emotions of basketball fans being something that she didn't really want to experience.

The ritual called for him to go into a lower stance, more catlike. He dropped to the kneeling position, feeling his feet turn without him even thinking it. Brennan had told him this would be a good sign, letting him know the body was working with the mind.

He opened his eyes and saw that Adam had joined him. Adam was lost in his own thoughts and was hard at his own workout. Jesse smiled then continued.

The muscles stretched then popped accordingly, ready for whatever the day had planned. He stood up straight, gave himself one last stretch in an attempt to touch his toes, then leaned back, letting his spine align.

"You done?" Adam asked quietly, "Or you need more time?"

"I'm good, just wanted to go take a shower," Jesse replied, "What's up?"

"Brennan wanted to see you down in the dojo when you were done here," Adam said, "Something about you two working out."

Jesse smiled. This would be fun. Brennan had wanted Jesse's shoulder to heal before they worked out. He felt ready and knew that this would be a great blow off of steam. He walked in and headed toward the area that Brennan had turned into a dojo. He realized as he approached he wouldn't be alone. He saw that Brennan was there in mid-routine with Shalimar. He was in awe of their symmetry in their own Tai-Chi. Shalimar had tried for years to get Jesse into a routine with her, but he was still solo workout guy. He knew that having Shalimar workout with him would be a distraction, not because of her good looks, but because she would make him laugh and lose his concentration.

With Brennan, though, he had a chance to see her through different, more adult eyes. She was a mirror to every complicated move of Brennan's while he could see Brennan having troubles with hers. Shalimar, being feral, had a dexterity that Brennan could only dream of. She turned, flipped backward effortlessly then bowed at Brennan. Brennan finished his part of the kata then bowed back at her. They stood there for a few moments, looking into each others eyes, lost in their own world. Jesse hated to shatter the scene, but he knew if he didn't, Brennan would be lost to a workout.

"So, how can I learn that?" Jesse asked quickly, "You think that Shalimar can teach me?"

Brennan and Shalimar laughed. Shalimar turned and looked at Jesse. He looked so much better since he stood in front of the burning warehouse.

"You couldn't handle me as your teacher Jesse," Shalimar replied, giving him a devilish wink, "I would kick your ass."

"Yes maam," Jesse laughed, "So, I'll let Brennan kick it instead."

Brennan gave him a total devil grin and motioned for him to join him on the floor of the dojo.

"I won't kick it," Brennan said, "I might bruise it though."

Jesse smiled and dropped his shoes at the edge of the mat. Brennan bowed, as Jesse did then stopped.

"Powers okay?" Jesse asked, "Or will you cheat?"

"Me, Cheat?" Brennan laughed, "No cheating, powers are okay."

Jesse dropped into a crouch as they circled each other. He knew that his size, compared to Brennan's was an advantage, but Brennan could easily topple him. They turned against each other, testing each other's reactions, Jesse in attack and Brennan blocking every blow, while Brennan attacked Jesse, he countered every blow. Jesse kept going over and over until Brennan held both hands up in an act of submission. Jesse had placed him in a corner he could not get out of.

"I didn't just do that, did I?" Jesse was a bit shocked. He had never bested Brennan that quickly before.

"Yeah, you did," Brennan was as shocked as Jesse was, "You seemed to know every move before I did it. I know we joked about using powers, but, Jesse, were you using yours?"

"No," Jesse stopped for a moment, "I didn't use them because I was fighting with you. I was too busy concentrating on my punches to not hurt you, as I know you were with me. This is odd."

"No, it's normal," Brennan smiled, shock fading from his face, "You do realize that your power has been growing."

"Yeah, I have, but I have worked on it," Jesse replied, "You're sounding an awful lot like Adam."

"Adam and I talked about it," Brennan began, "I also have read about telepathy when you have been sleeping. You were not just defending yourself, you were using it to defend yourself."

"And you used today to test it?" Jesse asked, slightly annoyed, "Wish you could have told me."

"If I had, you wouldn't have been able to do this," Brennan said, meeting Jesse's angry look, "Jesse, it's growing and you're controlling it. This is good news."

"It doesn't feel so good Brennan," Jesse replied, "Let's go another round. I need to work out, you mind?"

"Go for it," Brennan said, as Jesse lunged toward him, "Just don't kill me bro."

While they worked out and Jesse worked out his issues, Emma sat drinking coffee, trying to wake up. She had worked with Jesse through the night, testing the edges of his powers and helping him to build the filters he needed to get through a regular day. She was exhausted and cranky, but she knew she had to help him.

Lexa padded into the kitchen, stared at Emma for a moment, then grabbed a coffee mug and joined her. It was the lethal brew that she loved Jesse for, coffee that was strong enough to stand a spoon in. Lexa hadn't slept well herself, her evening spent working her contacts to find out any form of information on the Creator's lost children.

"Good morning?" Lexa asked quietly, noting Emma's lack of acknowledgement.

Emma looked at her, her half awake stare meeting Lexa's bright eyes.

"Not much sleep, sorry," Emma muttered, "You?"

"Too much time in front of the computer," Lexa replied, "We've got what, fifteen minutes before Pierce wakes up?"

A blond streak ran into the kitchen to hug Lexa.

"Make that Zip," Lexa smiled, "Morning honey, why don't you go see what Jesse and Brennan are up to?"

Pierce smiled and ran downstairs to the area that Brennan had turned into a dojo.

Emma glanced at Lexa.

"Thank you," Emma replied, "I don't have the energy yet to deal with a 4 year old telepath."

"Neither do I," Lexa poured them both another cup of coffee, "Let Jesse deal with him, he's more awake."

Jesse was busy, getting his butt kicked by his best friend. Ever since the realization that Jesse was using his telepathy in their fight it was as if a block had formed when he fought. He knew that he could predict every punch and blow the Brennan would pull on him, but, he found that he kept getting hit. He was over analyzing everything.

"Stop it Jesse, you are thinking too much," Brennan finally said, "I don't want to hurt you."

Jesse stopped. He let himself fall onto the mat and hit it, frustrated. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His body asked if he wanted to phase or mass, a question he ignored. It had always been a question in his mind every time he held his breath, it was one that usually was answered by instinct.

"I know how you feel," Brennan said, settling into the mat next to him, "You want to talk about it?"

"Talk about my frustrations, yeah, but thing is, do you have hours on end?" Jesse was bitter, he thought he had been doing better in the past few weeks, "I want to put a handle on this, but every time I think I have it, it gets harder to deal with."

"Maybe you're overthinking it?" Brennan asked, "I know you're working to control it with Emma, she told me about it. She said you're making great progress. And we're all trying to think less around you..."

"Not hard for you," Jesse grinned, trying to break the seriousness of the conversation, "Oh and duck."

"Duck?" Brennan asked as a blond child grabbed him in a bear hug by the back of the neck.

"Morning Pierce," Jesse laughed, taking the blond giggling child from Brennan, "How are you this morning?"

"Wonderful," Pierce said, the child staring at him, "How about you Jesse?"

"I'm working out with Uncle Brennan," Jesse gave Brennan a glance, "You want to workout too?"

The gray eyes that met his were more questioning than the willing child he had gotten to know, something was bothering him.

"You okay, Pierce?" Jesse asked.

"No," Pierce said, "I wanted to ask you if you saw the kids last night?"

Jesse stopped. Pierce had never talked about any other kids, except the ones who were in Amish country. They had spent time explaining to him what had happened after Jesse had come out of his shock. Pierce understood that what the Creator had done was wrong. But, this was the first time that he had mentioned other kids.

"No," Jesse replied, "What happened with them, Pierce. Were they looking for you?"

"Yeah, they were," Pierce replied, "They want to come here and play. Can they Jesse? Or do I have to ask Uncle Adam?"

Jesse stopped and looked at Brennan. Their life had just changed again.


	2. Back Step Chatper 2

Chapter 2

Legal Disclaimer-The following characters belong to Alliance Atlantis, Tribune Entertainment, Marvel and the rest who shall remain unmentionable.

Author's Note-So, you want more eh? Here you go. My only comments here are that I blame 'Blood Ties' for the whole idea. Jag, thank you for your website. The pictures have kept me going with Jesse stories as well. Please review, your writer's sanity depends on it.

Dedication time-Brigitta-this one's for you, honey. What you said in the last review was heartwarming. Thank you.

Chapter 2

"The other kids?" Jesse asked, "What do you know about them, Pierce?"

"We talk like you and I used to," Pierce said, "You and Emma told me I shouldn't talk without speaking, so I only talk to them in my head."

Jesse winced. In their desire to hear Pierce speak, they had denied him an outlet to his friends, and their chance at a lead to the Creator. Jesse kicked himself. They should have never done this to the child.

"What do you guys talk about?" Brennan asked, pulling Pierce into his lap, "Do they want to know how you are?"

"Yeah, they do," Pierce continued, "They are a little jealous that I get to run around, and learn things from you, Jesse, Emma, Lexa, Aunt Shal, and Adam. They want to too, but Grandpa wants to keep them quiet."

Brennan's raised eyebrow was followed by the thought that Jesse couldn't help but read.

_Who the heck is Grandpa?_

Jesse looked at him and sent back the reply before Pierce could even think it.

_The Creator._

Brennan's eyes widened. It was hard to remember that this child was once under the thumb of the man who killed many in the quest for perfect science. Pierce hadn't gotten to the point of calling Jesse and Lexa mom and dad, but Brennan knew he would over time. Kids did have a tendency to do that and adapt.

Jesse was upset though, and it showed all over his face. His voice stayed calm but Brennan feared what he was going to do next.

"Why does Grandpa want them quiet, Pierce?" Jesse asked.

"He wants to find me and you and bring us back to him," Pierce said, "That's what they told me."

Jesse stared at Pierce, his eyes locking on his child's. Pierce didn't move and to Brennan, the child stiffened up. Jesse gasped, blinked, and then reacted to Pierce's last statement. Pierce looked at him like he had been slapped, his honey colored eyes welling with tears. Jesse looked away from the child, then at Brennan and got up. He couldn't face Pierce at that moment. Brennan looked at the little boy. Pierce started to cry silently. Brennan pulled him into a protective hug.

"What's wrong, little man?" Brennan asked, trying to calm the upset child, "Jesse, what did you do?"

"Brennan, get him out of here, take him to Lexa or Emma," Jesse said, "I don't want to hurt him any further."

"Jesse, you won't hurt me again, you just wanted to know, and I didn't tell you," Pierce said softly, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this earlier."

Jesse crumpled. The pleading for acceptance in his son's voice broke his heart. He had violated his trust and felt horrible for doing so. Brennan looked at him shocked and concerned because he didn't know what had upset Jesse so badly.

"What did he do to you, Pierce?" Brennan asked.

"I read him, without any pretense, and I hurt him," Jesse replied coldly, "Get him out of here Brennan, I don't want to hurt him anymore."

"You couldn't hurt me," Pierce said, as he ran from the room, heading for Emma and Lexa, "I would hurt you first."

Jesse watched the child run away. He knew that he was right. Brennan stared at him.

"What the hell was that for?" Brennan's tone was accusing, "Why did you read him?"

Jesse couldn't meet his friends look. He was asking himself the same question. It was automatic. He didn't want to do it, he just felt himself doing it and unable to stop. He wasn't even gentle, like he had been with Emma, he was brutal and got the images from Pierce of the kids and their comments to him like he was ripping the pages from a picture book. It horrified him that he did it.

"I don't know, I just did," Jesse replied, hitting the wall of the room in frustration, "I couldn't help it. I had to know what the kids wanted from him."

"They want to know where we are, Jesse," Brennan replied, "And it's about time we bring Adam into this. You can't do this alone, and I don't think that I am being a help to you at all."

"Brennan, it might be best if all of you left me alone," Jesse said, turning around to face his friend, "If I can hurt a four year old like that, what would I do to you or Shalimar?"

"We can and will take it," Brennan replied, "Get yourself together, you need our help and like it or not, you're getting it."

Lexa and Emma did their best to console Pierce. He wouldn't tell them what happened, but Emma sensed it. She didn't tell Lexa, just asked her to watch him while she went to find Jesse. She tried to him telepathically, but she knew that he was trying to block her with the images coming back to her. She went down toward the dojo, knowing that Brennan was working out with him. Brennan was by himself, upset by the attitude that Jesse had given him, and happy that Emma was going after him. She was the only one who could understand what Jesse was going through.

Emma thought as she stood with Brennan and realized where Jesse might be. She went toward their bedrooms and went down the stairs to their bedrooms. Jesse needed to blow off the steam she knew he had built up and would be trying to take a shower. Luckily, the shower in their room had the best pressure and he would be beneath it, trying to wash his skin off.

As she entered the room, she heard him in the shower. He was in there. She heard the shower turn off.

"I don't want to talk about it, Emma," Jesse said from inside the bathroom, "You should already know that."

"You're going to want to, and that's why I am here, Pierce is with Lexa, and he's okay," Emma replied, making the bed.

Jesse stopped for a second. He was thinking that but he knew that she meant well. He didn't mind the intrusion, but, he was angry with himself. He had brutally read Pierce's mind, and he knew that he had hurt the boy. He toweled off, yanked his jeans on and wrapped the towel around his shoulders as he exited the bathroom. Emma sat on the bed, her blue eyes meeting his troubled ones.

He leaned over the bed and kissed her.

"Good morning," he said, looking in the drawer for a t-shirt, "Sorry you had to wake up to this."

"I'm not sorry," Emma said, "I kind of expected it."

"Not in the mood for the analysis, Emma, I'm already beating myself up for it, did Pierce tell you or did you read it?" Jesse asked, knowing that fighting her wasn't going to work.

"Read it off of him, he was reeling with it when he found me and Lexa, I told her he had fallen," Emma continued, "She bought it and is with him now. She'll be mad when she finds out. Brennan seems okay with it. You did it uncontrollably Jesse. What started it?"

"He had a dream last night about the other kids," Jesse said, pulling on a white T-shirt, "They want to come here and play with him. He didn't tell us because we don't want him 'speaking with his head' so he talks to them and not to us."

"He told you that?" Emma asked.

"Yeah," his reply was muffled by the shirt going on over his head, "He talks to kids in pods but not to his own parents. Some father I am huh?"

Emma sighed. Jesse was still having a hard enough time being a telepath, let alone being a father. Lexa was taking to parenting well, taking care of Pierce half of the time, while the rest of the team also treated Pierce like their own. They left the harder decisions to Jesse, Lexa and Emma. They all protected him, but were never critical. They had encouraged him to talk, not to telepathically call them unless it was urgent. Emma and Jesse had agreed to parent by example, and Pierce had taken to it, but, for Jesse to do this was wrong. He had screwed up and he knew it.

Jesse turned back to her. She looked at him, her mind unreadable, her expression sorrowful. He sat down next to her.

"You're the best father he's got," Emma started, "You just don't know how to handle yourself, let alone a four year old hyperactive telepath. Pierce is very lucky."

"How?" Jesse snorted.

"He's got six parents," Emma continued, "Brennan keeps him moving, Shalimar teaches him coordination, Adam tackles the education side of things, Lexa has taught him patience, I'm working on his control, while you are teaching him the most important thing...love."

"Yeah, right," Jesse was bitter, he didn't like screwing up, "Some love. I can't control my own power, I haven't spent any time with him, and I hate myself for what I have done to him."

"You didn't do it on purpose, Jesse, grow up," Emma said, her lack of sleep adding to her frustration, "You needed the information and you lacked patience. That's it. Pierce needed to learn this, and seeing you this upset is making him even more upset. You made a mistake. That's it."

Emma was right. He was beating himself up for a small mistake. He didn't want to read Pierce, he just needed to know the information, because his suspicion had gone on overload. He really couldn't control this power and it bothered him. He turned from Emma and stood up.

"I know, I'm just having trouble with all of this," Jesse looked at her, "I made a breakthrough with Brennan earlier, I read his moves in the dojo before he threw them, but, after he pointed it out to me, I couldn't do it."

"You were working on instinct?" Emma asked, "That's very good."

"Yeah, but," Jesse stared at his wife, gently trying to read her. Nothing happened. He tried again, this time a little harder.

It didn't work. He tried to scan her again, this time, nothing working. Emma looked at him blankly.

"But what?" Emma asked, breaking his concentration.

"I can't do it," Jesse said, frustration building, "I can't read you or anyone since I read Pierce."

Emma stared at him. This was new. Jesse wasn't the type to have things like a total block happen. He didn't function that way.

_Bull_ she thought loudly.

Jesse glanced at her.

"That I heard," he said, "Thanks a lot."

Emma took his hand and kissed it. Something deep inside told her that he needed it, just a simple expression of love. He took her hand and stared at it. He knew she meant well, she loved him more than breathing, and she was taking a tremendous emotional beating with all that had happened to them in the past few weeks. He hadn't been there for her like he wanted to be and it hurt. His mind drifted back to the love he had for her and his desire for peace and happiness.

_You're going to be okay, sweetie, you will be_

He heard the thought as if it was whispered to him. He looked into her eyes and tried to read them. The silence he met there was deafening.

"Dammit Emma, what's happening to me?" he said, frustrated, "I didn't want this power and now I can't use it."

"Enough of this, we're going to Adam," Emma said, getting up, "Come with me, Jesse. Now."

Jesse obeyed.


	3. BackStep Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Legal Disclaimer- The characters in the following story belong to Alliance Atlantis, Tribune Entertainment, Fireworks, Marvel and Avi Arad.

Authors Note-Yeah, I had thought of orphaning it, I admit it. I also managed to get pretty sick in the past month. Ever hear of Anemia? Iron poor blood does wacky things to you, and I had managed to work on this a bit, then wake up on the floor from passing out…Not fun when the head hits the computer desk. I'm okay though. Wings, here you go. You helped remind me. Thanks! Also, I love DVD's and DVD interviews. Man, Forbes has VERY nice eyes.

Jesse was finally asleep after Adam ran yet another test. Emma had gone directly to him when they discovered that Jesse could no longer use his telepathy. Adam had kept him in the lab for hours, the rest of the team taking turns on taking care of Pierce and running the continuing search for the rest of the kids. Pierce had been questioned further by Lexa about the other kids, trying to get the child to describe the area that the kids were calling him from, and Pierce tried, but wasn't able to help them in pinpointing a location. He was also a little reluctant to help them, since the last time he had mentioned the kids caused him pain. When Lexa found why Pierce was hurt she was upset with Jesse, but Emma talked to her about it. Strangely enough the women were finally beginning to get along.

Emma watched her husband sleep. The Jesse she knew looked years younger when he slept, this time he looked older. Something had triggered this episode. She didn't know how to explain it to Adam and hated herself for saying "Fix him." Adam wasn't perfect, but at least he knew more about mutants and how they worked than anyone else they could trust. Jesse was physically fine, this she knew, something else was eating him. Her hunch was that his inability was psychological, he had hurt with his gifts, so now they were more like curses.

She turned back to the waiting crowd of people. Lexa had taken Pierce out for a little while, hoping that playing in fresh air would help jog his memory and also wear the hyperactive child out. Brennan and Shalimar had stayed with Emma, running additional tests when Adam asked them to, but keeping an eye on their other patient, Emma.

Adam came into the small room that overlooked the lab and stared at the group. He knew the team would protect each other, no matter what. This was a hard one to explain though.

"Nothing is physically wrong with him," Adam started, "I have run every single test imaginable, and believe it or not, he's fine."

"His lack of telepathy though?" Emma asked, "He had it up until he worked out with Brennan."

"And he didn't get hurt by me," Brennan interrupted, "He was actually doing quite well, like he was reading my next moves before I thought them. I commented on it. The situation with Pierce was right after that, Emma."

"What situation with Pierce?" Shalimar asked from her perch on the edge of the couch, "What happened?"

"Jesse read him without permission, and he did it quite forcefully," Emma replied quickly, "Pierce is alright, but it upset Jesse more than it did Pierce."

"Upset him enough to shut his telepathy off," Adam concluded, "That's the best I can figure it. I know that it's a useful power for him to have, and he's well equipped to have it, but he's not using it at all. He put walls up, we all know that, but he's put them so far up and out of reach that he's shut that part of himself down."

"Can he still mass and phase Adam?" Brennan asked, "I know that's like breathing for him, but, has he completely shut down?"

"He can still mass and phase, but I don't know for how long, and I wouldn't even mention it to him," Adam replied, "I think we're just going to have to act like he has never had this power, it will more than likely come back in spades. Just be ready. If you think that his first experience with a lack of control was bad, this could be a whole lot worse."

Emma shuddered at the thought of Jesse with his hands over his ears, his eyes glazed, chanting "get them to stop yelling" over and over. She had pulled him out of that, had seen him blossom with the arrival of Pierce, and actually gotten used to stepping back into this life.

"We can handle it," Shalimar said, her voice soft but confident, "Jesse is one of us. We protect our own."

"Yes we do," Adam said, "He'll need our help more than anything else. Where's Lexa? I know that she was taking Pierce out for a little while, I need to check on him."

"Last I heard they were okay, she would have called if he was hurt," Emma replied, "She knows what happened now."

"I just want to check him as well," Adam smiled, a smile somewhere between happy and grim, "I want to make sure that he's not acting like Jesse is. This isn't right, the way he's acting, Emma. You sensed it and brought him to me. Therefore, he's off missions until we know what's going on with him."

"He's not going to like that," Brennan said, "You know he's worse than me on staying in."

"Yes, but I don't want him going off the handle when the chips are down," Adam continued, "You guys are going to be in for it when we find these kids. The Creator and what's left of the Dominion are killers. I just want all of you as one mind when you need to be."

"We are," Brennan met Adam's worried gaze, "Jesse will be with us."

"Good," Adam replied, "I still want him to stick close to home for a short while though. He needs the rest."

"Who needs the rest?" Jesse asked, coming into the room from the lab, "Me?"

"Yes, you," Emma laughed, "How you feeling?"

"I'm okay," Jesse replied, taking a second to look at the reactions of his friends, "Adam doesn't think so huh?"

"No, I think you need to rest, Jesse," Adam's look of concern ran over him, "You have worn yourself out emotionally, physically and haven't thought about much other than getting the Creator."

Jesse glared at him. He was right, but he didn't like being reminded of it. His primary thought since hearing the kids scream was vengeance. He wanted to roast the man like he roasted the kids in their pods. That was a rage he couldn't get out of his system. As much as he tried to pull that one emotion under control, it had become impossible. Emma gasped, the emotion radiating from Jesse was so raw it made her taste blood in her mouth.

Jesse grabbed her arm as she reeled from it.

"Em, you okay?" he asked, instantly concerned.

Emma looked at him, her eyes slightly glazed. His touching her instantly broke the wave he was throwing, but, it did hurt. His rage was both intoxicating and frightening. She shook her head as her eyes became a lighter shade of blue.

"Yeah," she said softly, "Jesse, listen to Adam this time, you need to take a little time, spend it with Pierce, okay?"

Jesse was a little startled. Emma had suggested he see Adam, she had told him everything would be okay, but, he couldn't read this reaction from her. She looked at him, her eyes with the usual reading of love that he knew, but something wasn't right. He wanted her to spend time with Pierce, but for him to not be on this mission wasn't what he expected.

Brennan read the emotion off of his face. Something wasn't right for Emma, who only moments before had been pro-Jesse had instantly changed. She sensed something that they didn't and he was going to follow her lead.

"Jess, listen to her," he said, knowing that the double whammy of Emma and himself would work wonders, "We'll call you in when it's time for all the fun."

Jesse looked at them. They were right.

"Okay, okay," Jesse agreed.


	4. BackstepChapter 4

Chapter 4

Legal Disclaimer-The rights belong to others. I'm just writing fanfic here.

Authors Note-I warn you, it's short. Sorry. Nice to be able to write again though. I'm feeling better, and I promise I will get more of this to you.

Emma left their communal spot to go outside and breathe in the fresh air. Jesse was working with Adam on the dynamics of the scouting mission to find the kids that Pierce had spoken of, trying to piece together the fragments of what he had pulled from his son's mind. Emma knew he could handle and the rest he had during the tests had actually calmed him down. The waves of emotion she had from him needed some clearing as it was. Brennan noticed her escape and followed her to the upper deck of Haven, and stood for a moment in the shadows of the glass doors before he said anything.

"So, you mind telling me what you felt or saw, Emma, or am I going to have to beg you?" Brennan asked her, breaking the silence.

Emma stared at him. Even with their three year separation, this was the Brennan she knew so well. He wanted to know how to help her and Jesse. She appreciated it, but the range of emotions that had streamed from Jesse were hard to shake. His concern for both her and Jesse washed over her.

"No, you don't have to beg me, but," she stopped, looking at her shoes for a moment, "I don't know what I can do. He's so angry. It's a level of rage that I can barely tolerate, Brennan."

"Rage?" Brennan asked, "He's angry about the kids, I know. For him to attack Pierce like that is not like him, could it be the anger over the kids' deaths?"

"Probably, I'm not a shrink, but he turns off, becomes so cold when the Creator is mentioned, Brennan, he's like a whole different personality," Emma looked up at Brennan, "You have to understand, he's setting me off. I can't concentrate when he gets angry Brennan, he effects me."

Brennan nodded. Being an empath was not an easy life for Emma and he knew like they all did how hard emotions were for her. Living with Jesse like this was like living with a ticking bomb. When he went off, she would be in the wreckage is she wasn't prepared for him.

"Okay, so you think he's doing this unconsciously?" Brennan asked, "He didn't realize what he was doing to Pierce until he did it, and he was quite vicious about it."

Emma took a moment and shook the dark feelings from her mind. When Jesse had touched her, it set her into a very lonely place, darker than she wanted, loud and the smell of flesh burning made her stomach turn. While Jesse never admitted it, his experience with the Creator had really messed him up. She didn't know how to help him.

"I don't know Brennan and that's what scares me the most," she admitted, "He's hurting. This telepathy block is just part of it. I'm glad that Adam has grounded him, but, I don't know what to do."

"I don't think this block is his doing," Brennan stared at Emma for a second, "Emma, is it possible to control someone through…"

"Telepathy, yes, but," Emma looked at him, "Jesse? I think I would have seen it.."

"We all should see it if it's there, including Adam," Brennan turned, "Where are Lexa and Pierce?"

Lexa was enjoying watching Pierce run through the playground. He had begged her for an escape from the place, wanting more and more to run around. Lexa couldn't resist. As Emma had put it, you had to have energy to chase after a hyperactive 4 year old.

And what a child he was. His eyes reminded her of Leo. His smile was 100 Jesse as was the twinkle in his eyes. She pondered for a moment where she was in him. She really couldn't see it. She knew she would eventually find it, but she couldn't see the mirror that kids should be.

Pierce ran up to her, took the juice box she offered and ran back to the monkey bars where he climbed then hung upside down. Adam had told her that his running around was good for him, the time he spent in the pod had been murder to his physical development, but his emotional development needed to be out with the other kids who looked his age, while they all knew he was extremely intelligent and didn't speak like an average four year old.

Lexa snickered at the thought. She knew that when she was that age, she didn't speak like an average four year old. Jesse, well, she hadn't asked him.

Pierce, on the other hand, was not an average kid. He was built small, and the other kids didn't seem to mind that he was a little pushy toward climbing and running around. It was almost like he needed the sun to live. In a way, he did. Lexa knew her powers worked better the more that she was out in the sun. She had asked Adam about it and he told her it was mainly physiological. Lexa felt like this one she knew better than Adam.

Pierce ran up, hugged her and ran back toward the swings. She watched him swing as high as he could, and she waved as he did at her. She was beginning to get used to this. She probably could be a good mother to him, she felt like it. With the help of Jesse, Adam, Emma, Shalimar and Brennan, she knew for the first time that she could probably raise a child with her abilities.

'_Hopefully he'll understand what I did and why someday,' _ she thought to herself, _'I just hope he's peaceful.'_

She smiled inwardly. The future for the first time looked very bright. She didn't see the van that had rolled into the playground behind them. She didn't see the person who had snuck up behind her and sadly, she didn't see the gloved hand that covered her face with the cholorform until it was too late.

Oblivion hit her and she succumbed to the sweet tasting darkness.

Jesse had been running yet another search online to find anything relating to the thousands of bank accounts that the Creator and the Dominion had put together hoping to find a connection when the feeling hit him. He felt the darkness that surrounded Lexa, along with the panic. He gasped, trying to put air into his rapidly depleting lungs, and fought to control the images he saw in front of him. His eyes widened in fear.

Shalimar, who had been sitting at the computer across from him sprang to his side. She had seen this kind of look from Emma a few times and knew that something was very wrong. Jesse's stare was blank and he had begun to sweat. She took a moment, then gently touched his shaking back.

"Jess? You okay?" she asked, "What do you see?"

Jesse jumped like he had been shocked when her fingers made contact with his skin. He grabbed her hand then, shaking his head, looked into her eyes.

"I don't know, everything just went black," Jesse said softly, "I think it was Lexa."

"Lexa's out with Pierce," Shalimar said, "She should have her commring on, I know she pulled it on when she left."

"Yeah, she did, but, something is wrong, Shalimar," Jesse said, stopping. He pulled up his ready access to the commring network he had set up. Hers had gone steady. Pierce's though, which was near hers, had been moving, like he was running in circles. As they watched, it stopped.

Jesse grew silent again, gasped, looked up at Shalimar then passed out.


	5. BackStep Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Legal Disclaimer-To own is to make money, to borrow is to write Fan fiction. I do not own these characters, they belong to others. I make no cash from this. Sorry. Don't sue me.

Authors Note-For you Aniki, you got 10 whole pages. Brigitta, thanks for the constant support. Guys, glad you like. Reviews keep me sane. I'm back as long as Real Life doesn't intercede. On the health front, I'm doing better. No really, I am. I'm currently debating just what is going to happen to Pierce. Thoughts and reviews are welcome.

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The light hurt. It hurt more than Lexa Pierce wanted to admit. She liked light. She could bend it, make it her weapon, but the pain it caused hurt more than she liked to admit. The thought that she was lying on a floor, when only moments ago she was watching Pierce play…

_WHERE IS PIERCE_? Panic overrode her thought process. She couldn't think, she couldn't see, and she couldn't think. She tried to take a breath in and discovered that her chest hurt. A quick self exam revealed a broken rib. She must have fought whoever put her here. She felt the back of her neck which already felt heavy and put fingers to a cold metal lump. The sub dermal governor hurt. It meant they knew she was a mutant. Hopefully they didn't put the same on Pierce. She couldn't imagine what it would do to the little boy.

_Oh god, where was he?_ She slowly opened her eyes to the bright light and tried to lift herself up. She knew that if she did, she might be able to find the boy, but it hurt to simply move. The thought of her child in pain began to override her own. She had to find him now.

The light was so bright, the white walls of the room adding to the light. It reminded her of when she got lost as a child in a blinding snowstorm. All she saw ahead of her was white. All she saw now was white. By blinding her they controlled her, she thought to herself. Well, they could try, she could act like they were, but she would find the child.

"Nice to see you're awake," a somewhat familiar voice said, coming into the edge of her sight, "The last time I saw you, you were a goner."

She could tell it was a man whose name she never knew. He had dark air, was vaguely Italian looking and headed the old form of the dominion. She hated him the moment he told her that he could control everything in the Dominion, including her. That didn't happen then and she knew it wouldn't happen now.

"Obviously that didn't happen," she said, "What's with the bright lights?"

"You forget that we know your power, Ms. Pierce, and we have been watching you," he continued, "The light is to overload your powers."

"Overload me with a sub dermal on, that's overdoing it, don't you think?" Lexa said mockingly, "You don't know that much about me. I don't even know your name."

The man turned and looked at her.

"You can call me the Director," he said, "I'll let you sit here in the light for a little while longer. I have questions I will ask, but only when you want me to stop the pain you will be feeling. Answer the questions and I'll stop your pain."

Lexa looked at him and laughed.

"You don't know me, pain doesn't do it," she said, trying to figure out where he had stepped, "I don't react to it."

"Yes, I do know that, Ms. Pierce, but how do you react to torment?" the director asked rhetorically, "First you, the boy, and then the rest of Mutant X?"

Lexa glared at him. She wouldn't admit to being scared, but her memories of torment instantly replayed in her mind from the last time she saw the director. He had interrogated Jesse in front of her, hooking him up to machines that she knew would kill him. Jesse, the one guy since her brother had been so strong for her, but was scared like she was. She still cared about Jesse, she knew she loved him, but the love she felt now was more for a brother than for a lover. She couldn't help but remember his screams. They had torn at her heart and made her want to tell the man everything. Thankfully she did have to that time. This time was going to be worse. There wasn't a backup virus to blow up this man's computers. She couldn't get them out of this one. It was up to Jesse.

Torment was something that Jesse Kilmartin was secretly praying would stop in his life. He had felt the world go dark around Lexa, he had felt her pain and knew that she was alive, but couldn't control his own growing fear. Lexa couldn't find Pierce and was panicked over it.

He woke up on the floor soon after his head hit the computer desk. He was dazed, felt like holy hell and knew that the headache would soon follow. He tried to focus on Shalimar who had lifted him back into the chair and was trying to get him to talk. Shalimar's yell had brought Adam out of the lab and Emma in a dead run to them. He knew that Emma could help, but if he could just find his voice, it would make much more sense to him. It was very disorienting to think that he had been working on the computer one minute and the next minute be completely lost.

Something was very wrong with Lexa. Jesse knew that Lexa was in trouble the second that his vision had blackened and he felt an overwhelming fear. Lexa stayed calm in nearly everything that they had done together, but this time, he knew something was horribly wrong. She was never this scared. He wanted to reach out to her, tell her that everything would be fine, but he couldn't. His frustration at the block of this new power ate at him instantly. He could feel everything that was happening to her but he could do nothing. Panic had grabbed her again and he felt like couldn't breathe.

Emma grabbed Jesse's face and turned his panicked eyes to meet hers. She didn't have to speak; he became silent and stared back. Shalimar had backed away, knowing that Emma could do wonders when Jesse was this far gone, but she was a bit brutal. The situation did call for unusual measures.

"Jesse, what do you see?" Emma asked, breaking the silence, "You are seeing something, come on, tell me what you see."

Jesse nodded, his eyes growing colder. His breathing had changed to normal, but his expression was almost blank. He started to speak, stopped and tried again.

"It's Lexa. First it was all darkness, now it's light, bright light. God, it hurts," Jesse's voice was soft and low, almost sounding childlike, "It's so bright she can't see."

Breathlessly, Brennan joined them. He had heard Shalimar's call and ran upstairs to see what had happened. He could tell it was bad from the body language that Emma was radiating and how Jesse looked so alone. Adam was in the shadows near the couple. Kane didn't speak, he just watched.

"What the?" his question was interrupted by Shalimar's hand grabbing his arm.

"It looks like Lexa and Pierce have been kidnapped, Jesse felt everything and passed out from it," she said, under her breath, "Emma's got him talking, he really wasn't here a few minutes ago."

Brennan nodded. Shalimar knew just the way to tell him, her calmness took his concern down a small notch. Jesse didn't look like he had come back. He was staring straight ahead at Emma, but you could tell that he couldn't see her. He held back his own panic on Lexa. He knew that wouldn't help Jesse. He thought of Lexa. In the few years he had known the other elemental; she would never let herself get kidnapped. This was bad.

"Any idea on where she is?" Brennan asked.

"She's in light," Jesse said, breaking his gaze from Emma and turning to Brennan, "She's just covered in it. She won't admit it, but she's scared."

"What scares Lexa?" Brennan asked, "She doesn't scare easily, Jesse."

"She's terrified, Bren," Jesse said, the light returning to his eyes, "She doesn't have a clue on what to do, either."

Brennan moved closer to his friend, not breaking Jesse's distant yet aware gaze. He knelt next to his friend's chair. Jesse was looking more and more like himself, but he could still see the fear in his body language.

"How is this affecting you?" Brennan asked, "Can you communicate with her, or is this one way, Jess?"

"One-Way, dammit," Jesse looked at Brennan, unable to hide the bitterness and the frustration in his voice, "I can't send anything out to her at all. And nothing from Pierce."

He hit the desk with a fist in frustration. He took a breath and massed his fist, wanting to hit the desk again, knowing it would shatter, and then took a moment to stop. He took a deep breath. He closed his eyes, letting go of Emma's hand to rub them.

Brennan took a moment before answering him. Jesse this frustrated was rare and he kicked himself internally for not helping him through it earlier. He wanted to help him now but felt powerless to do anything. He left his mind open to the possibilities of helping him, trying to be the calm that Jesse was craving.

"Jesse, I know this is killing you but think, is there anyone who wants to take Lexa?" Brennan asked, "Think, bro. We know the guy in the chair is gone."

"His name was Abraham," Adam said softly from his perch in the shadows, "Good thought though Brennan, who could be after Lexa? More Dominion people? You guys were close."

"Were the operative word here, Adam," Jesse opened his eyes and looked at Emma, "I thought Lexa and all of this was out of my life until you called Shalimar. Lexa got her own life and never looked back."

"You're wrong on that, she kept in touch," Shalimar said, "And without her, you wouldn't have Pierce. Have you felt anything from him? You passed out after you told me that something had happened to Lexa. Anything else come up?"

Jesse looked at Shalimar.

"No," he said, "Nothing at all."

"He's probably unconscious," Emma said, putting her hand back into Jesse's, "You and Brennan are the only ones I can get when you're out; I haven't tried to do it with Pierce. I would rather that you try it first. You have the stronger connection to him that I do."

Jesse looked back at her. It all made logical sense, but it was still something he knew he couldn't do. She was telling the truth but he had to admit, he felt very alone.

"I can't," Jesse replied bitterly, "I have tried and tried. I get nothing Em, nothing."

Jesse got up and walked away from the group. The edges of their emotions were beginning to get to him. He knew they were concerned about him, that concern flowed over him in deep waves. He looked out the window.

"What we need is someone who can travel into the unconscious," Adam said aloud, "Henry Voight"

"Henry?" Emma asked, "We put him into the underground. Very far into the underground if I remember right. Finding him will be impossible."

Jesse turned back around. Henry would make sense. Even though he had used his powers against them as a team, he would be able to get to Pierce and Lexa in his own way. Henry traveled in dreamscapes and made sure that the team paid for what he thought was killing his wife. When they helped him find his very much alive wife, Adam put him into the safety of the underground, and onto the steps of a new life. While Jesse had felt he really didn't deserve it, he knew in the long run that it was the right thing that Adam did.

Reaching Henry wouldn't be hard. All it would take would be his clearance with the Service. Jesse sighed. He hadn't thought of the service in the six weeks since he had met Shalimar at the bar. His life had changed so severely. He didn't even feel like he was the same person. He knew that he wasn't.

"It won't be impossible. I can find him," Jesse said, "But he hasn't met Lexa or Pierce, how do we know if it's going to work or not?"

"It will have to," Adam said, "We'll have to find a way."

Jesse rested while Brennan, Shalimar and Emma worked with Jesse's computer clearance to find Henry Voight. Jesse had the highest level and could access records that they were never able to touch in the years in Sanctuary. Shalimar worked quietly, thinking over their last meeting with Henry and hoped that this one would end differently. Adam had to bargain their lives and found Henry's wife deep in the halls of Genomax, locked away in stasis.

She hoped that Henry was having a happy life. His need to be with his wife was understandable. Brianna was his life. To lose her he lost himself and actually started working for Eckhart. Even though he had tortured her in the dreamscape, she did have compassion for him. If anyone had done that to Brennan she would kill them first and ask the questions later.

She looked over to where Jesse napped. Adam had checked on him regularly, making sure that if any other contact from Lexa happened not only would he let them know, he also wanted to make sure that Jesse had no physiological damage. Adam worried about them, and she could tell by his look that what had happened to Jesse bothered him greatly. He wasn't talking about it, though. She knew they would talk eventually, but after what the Creator did to Jesse, she hoped that Adam wouldn't lose himself in his rage. She already feared that Jesse had. The look on her surrogate brother's face had scared her more than she liked to think. She had seen the strong confident Jesse she knew and loved vanish in a heartbeat. The frustration she knew he felt ached with her as well.

Emma stopped typing and stared at the screen.

"I found him," she said, staring at the screen, "Damn, Jesse was right, it wasn't impossible. Brianna is in the file as well, and, so is their son, Joshua."

"Where is he?" Brennan asked, trying to link to her file.

"D.C., believe it or not," she read aloud, "Henry's working for the DC metro system, and Brianna is teaching violin. Pretty normal lives."

"Not normal enough," Adam said, coming up behind Emma, "Wife, kid, no mention of a picket fence or a dog. He's also raising a child. Not normal thanks to the Creator. Brennan, why don't you and Shalimar go see him. Ask him if he is willing to help us. I know we have nothing to offer him, but, he might help us."

"He will," Brennan said, grabbing his jacket, "He's a dad. I think he'll understand."

Adam could understand. As much as he would deny it, he was a father to all of them in the room, and felt grandfatherly to Pierce. He wanted to help Jesse, but the younger man wouldn't take the help. Jesse needed to sort all of this out on his own, but there was little time and there are lives at stake. He didn't need to be psionic to feel the guilt washing over Jesse from his inability to use his powers.

As Brennan and Shalimar took the Strand into DC to find Henry, Jesse and Emma worked on his control and attempted once again to reach Lexa. Adam had tried to monitor Jesse, making sure that the molecular's life signs stayed regular. Jesse had waved him off. He was more irritated that this new power would not work when he desperately needed it to.

Adam stayed where he could watch Emma and Jesse. He regretted never telling the rest of the team that Emma was still alive. He knew that it was to save her life, but it still hurt to have to lie. This team of people had trusted him with their lives and for that he knew he had a responsibility to protect them as they had protected him.

After he was abducted by the Creator, he didn't want to lie to anyone anymore. He had lived a lie up until that moment and knew that he would live the rest of his days telling the truth until it killed him. He watched it kill Abraham, the man who tried so hard to keep Lexa alive in the Dominion, and he watched it nearly kill Jesse. He hoped and prayed that Lexa and Pierce were not victims of the lie that his very existence had become.

He watched Jesse struggle with trying to remain calm. The molecular had been so stubborn and headstrong when he first joined Mutant X. He was also so sheltered and sensitive it was hard to get him to come out from behind the keyboard and be a person. He was very proud of him, the thought of him being in the Secret Service was the perfect job for him, yet, he could see the pride he took in the job, realizing that while he had to know a tremendous number of things, and he could balance it with his sense of humor. He was so proud of all the younger man had done; he realized that it was a feeling like that of a parent.

He also watched Emma. The scared psionic he remembered from the bar had become a beautiful and talented woman. She spoke her mind when she needed to, worked on becoming a friend to her husband's ex-lover and was a part of the team. She didn't have to fight to fit in. She was trying so hard to get Jesse to concentrate on Lexa she did everything but slap him.

Emma knew what she had to do, and she knew that Henry Voight would be a great asset once he got there. Adam had warned them that when Jesse could let his walls down, he would be in a world of pain and hurt. Emma had to convince Jesse that this was the only way to get to Lexa and Pierce. This might work, and now that Brennan and Shalimar were out finding Henry, they could give it a try. Emma had Jesse working on a meditation when she got up and motioned for Adam to head into the lab with her.

"I have an idea, but I need you there in case he goes down," Emma started, the strain beginning to show on her face, "You said that when he lets the walls down it could be worse than when you guys found him, right?"

"Right," Adam remembered the moment when Jesse had begged him to get them to stop screaming, not knowing that Jesse had become psionic due to experimentation that kept him alive.

"When you and I are here, Jesse tends to be calm, two people's thoughts and emotions are doing wonders for him to handle, I think we can do this now, and we have to," Emma continued, "If he crashes, I'll help you bring him back, but he needs to do this now or he'll never be able to function."

Adam stared at her for a moment. The Emma who always asked if this was the right idea was long gone. A more confident woman stood in her place.

"Tell me what you want to do," Adam said, his eyes mirroring his smile.

Shalimar and Brennan were having great luck as well. The address the internet gave them was correct; if the wind blew right you could hear the whine of violins being practiced. The house was non-descript and in a small neighborhood. Brennan and Shalimar sat in a car they rented to watch the Voight house hoping that he could catch Henry leaving for work and talk to him that way. Brennan really didn't want to walk up to the door and knock, it wasn't in his nature. If they approached him together, he knew it would work.

He never saw Henry coming. Voight had walked up behind the car and stood there until Brennan realized that the man was staring at him. Shalimar laughed and got out of the car. She had told Brennan that they really should just go knock.

"You do realize that you can't sneak up on psionic, right?" Henry asked, "I'd ask you the how, but, Mr. Mulwray, I already know."

"Okay," Brennan said quickly, he still hated it when anyone wandered in his mind, even the ones he knew, "If you know how, you know why. I'll cut the crap, Henry. Can you help him or not?"

Henry Voight took a moment and stared at his two guests. Shalimar had a hard time believing it was the same man who had walked through her nightmares. He had cleaned up and looked peaceful, happy and the perfect family man.

"Thank you, Ms. Fox, I think you look happy as well, but the fears for your friend are quite intoxicating," Henry began, "I know you want me to help him. I think I can, but I don't know about the woman or the child. Let me tell Brianna what is going on. You contact Adam and tell him I'll come."

Brennan smiled. For the first time in weeks, things were going their way.

For Jesse to let down his barriers, it was going to be painful. He knew that. He also knew that this might not work. The night he woke up to the whispers of the children he knew that he would never again doubt the sincerity of his wife's abilities. Psionics were rarely understood unless someone walked a mile in their shoes. He heard everything from that moment and couldn't find his own thoughts in the mix. Going completely mad was one of his biggest fears. To let down the walls that Emma had helped him build was only going to make it worse. Or kill him. But, it gave him the chance to help Lexa and hopefully Pierce. He had felt and heard nothing from his child since he so brutally took the images from his mind of the dreams he had mentioned. Jesse still hated himself for that.

Emma touched his leg and he opened his eyes. She had returned to him and he found himself remarkably calm.

"Jesse, you're going to do this in a controlled situation," she began, "I want Adam to monitor you so you're going into the lab, do you understand?"

Jesse nodded. He had no other choice. He stood up and followed her into the lab. His blue eyes followed her as she helped Adam connect monitors to him. The need to be silent was obvious; he needed the quiet to stay calm for what was coming. Adam smiled at him.

"We're ready when you are," Adam said.

Emma took his hand in hers.

"How do I do this again?" Jesse asked softly, trying to break the seriousness of his mood.

Emma smiled.

"Think about when Sanctuary exploded," Emma suggested, smoothing out a lock of his hair on his forehead, "Use the same idea on your own walls. Blow them out of the water."

Jesse smiled. It was a great analogy. He closed his eyes and thought about when Sanctuary then the Helix exploded. He was already beaten from the Dominion, his hand hurt badly from the electrical torture that they had used. He held onto Lexa's hand and ran, ran as fast as he could and knew that if he got away, he could be okay.

He thought of Lexa. There was a time when he thought he could love her forever. She had taken his heart when Emma's "death" had broken it into a million pieces. He loved her. She had become more of a person to him during their brief time as a team. She wanted to be loved and he wanted to love her. She only had to accept him and it took a long time for him to succeed.

He breathed in. The walls he knew were there seemed smaller. He could feel the outside world beginning to creep in. He thought of Lexa again, their conversations and their arguments. Sometimes she could make him so angry.

The walls dropped even further. He could feel the panic that played with the calm that made up Adam Kane. Adam was nearby, reading every single reading several times, making sure that Jesse was well enough to continue. He also felt the extreme rage that he had over the treatment given to Jesse by the Creator and his frustration at not being able to reverse it. He wanted to help Jesse through this and hoped and prayed it would be easy. Sadly, it wasn't.

Emma's love radiated to him as the walls dropped further. He felt her trying to help him, her mind completely open, full of doors he could wander into, emotions of love and understanding flowing from her.

He watched the rest of the wall in his mind go down, thinking that kicking it might help it go. He put a foot out in his mind and thought like Brennan, one swift kick and it would be in pieces. It was, but he realized that with it, the voices had come back.

"Oh, God," he said, his hands going to his ears instantly, "This has got to stop."

He opened his eyes and could see Emma staring into his, with Adam behind her checking the monitors.

"The walls are down?" Emma asked, "Jesse can you hear me?"

Jesse saw her lips move, but couldn't really hear her. The voices were talking all around him, their volume drowning out everything else in his mind. He couldn't find his inner voice and felt like he was trapped. He tried to breathe in and could not. The thoughts were causing him not to think. He felt like he was falling. He tried to reach out for Emma, who took his hand.

Emma calmly stared at him. He wheezed, trying to bring more oxygen into his lungs, but it was obvious that he was scared.

"Just focus on my words, Jesse," she said aloud and his mind, "Mine only."

Jesse closed his eyes and tried to hear her. Her voice was lost among the din. Shouts were added to the chaos, and he couldn't focus. He pulled himself up into a ball and felt his hands go toward his head. He just wanted them to stop.

"_JESSE!"_ Emma screamed in his mind.

Jesse's eyes grew blank and the blackness engulfed him.


	6. Backstep Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Legal Disclaimer-This is a work of Fanfiction. The owners of these characters have no idea that I am writing this fanfiction, and I would be flattered if they read it.

Author's Notes-Guys, I love the reviews. Keep them coming. Pierce will make an appearance soon. I promise. Hope you all like Henry. I was scared by him in "Nothing to Fear" so, bringing him back is way too fun.

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Emma had expected him to pass out. She knew that the walls he had built were high enough to cause him problems, she even knew that he wouldn't know what to do once they were down. His vitals were steady, so this was more of his mind shutting off than his body. Part of her knew that he would try to go to a place of solitude, but she couldn't find him in the meadow location that they had created years ago.

She remembered the conversation as she sat staring at his still form. It had been years ago, but she felt like it was yesterday.

"If anything happens to you and you can't talk to me, I want you to remember your safest memory," she told him one night as they lay in bed talking about the past, "We can use it as a meeting place. Just tell me about it and I'll try to recreate in your mind."

He had described a meadow just over the hill from his parents place. It was always one of those places you read about in novels about not being able to go home again. It was wide, wild, and perfect for a little boy to get lost in. Jesse remembered it later as a place he ran to when he needed to think, or get away from his parents arguments. It's also where he realized that he was a little different from everyone else because the meadow was the first place he actually discovered that he could phase. For him, it was home.

She had recreated it with the most colors her mind could fathom, adding the memories she had of peaceful places from when she was growing up and discovering her own powers and what they possessed. She knew he loved it when he saw it, and their recent experience was enough to make her want to run back there screaming. She was craving serenity. The uneasiness that she felt from everyone since Lexa and Pierce were kidnapped was making her ache for solitude.

She closed her eyes and let herself settle into a meditative state where she could go to the meadow, hoping to find him somewhere in her psionic travels. She had kicked herself for encouraging him to let the walls down, but she knew that it was the right thing to do. They had to find Pierce and Lexa. Jesse's last moments with Pierce were horrible and if they didn't…Emma sighed outwardly. This was not the way to think.

_You're right, it's not_, a familiar voice joined her thoughts.

_Jesse?_ She said in her thoughts, hoping that it was his voice she heard.

She looked for Jesse in the meadow that she knew he loved and discovered he wasn't there.

_Keep looking, I'm here_, Jesse continued, _I don't think I can make the meadow, Em._

His inner voice sounded stronger than the childlike one she had heard earlier, but something sounded very wrong. She kept walking through the halls of her mind and what very well could have been Jesse's mind and stopped. Something didn't feel right. She turned a corner walked through a doorway and into a room she had hoped to never see again.

She was standing in the Pod staging area, from the now defunct Genomax days. It was in perfect working order, and Jesse was sitting on the edge of a closed pod. His head was down, as if he was looking at the occupant and feeling guilty over it. She walked up behind him and put her hand on his shoulder. He didn't move, he just put a hand on hers.

"Why are you here?" she asked, her wonder more of a dread, "You know that you control where you go in these situations, Jesse."

"Emma, if I knew how to control these images, I would never be here," Jesse said, his voice flat, "I opened my eyes and I was sitting here. I could barely hear you, the voices got so loud. The darkness was a much more comfortable place. Sorry if I scared you back there, that wasn't my intention."

"There must be a reason you are here then, can you think of one?" she asked, moving in to sit across from him on the pod's base, "Did the lab you were in look like this? Is this what you remember from Henry?"

Jesse let go of her hand and stood up. He didn't look at her.

"Yes," his reply was softly spoken, "You might remember that Henry could pull out our biggest fears, and this one was one of my biggest. I thought I had clobbered it. Guess not huh?"

"I guess," Emma replied, "You okay Jesse?"

Jesse was bitter. He was bitter, angry, and lost in his own mind. He knew his wife was trying to help him, loved her for it, but the desire to scream was becoming overwhelming.

"Am I okay?" Jesse laughed, the laugh sounding hollow, "Emma, you know that Henry found out our darkest fears and used them against us, but, no one in my life in Mutant X has ever asked me my fondest wish. We lived through so much together, before and after Mutant X that this time, I really don't know if I can live through it. I'm so tired."

Emma didn't answer. She just let Jesse talk. The anger radiating off him wasn't the rage she had felt earlier, this time it was more frustration over things that Jesse couldn't change. He needed to get this out, it had probably been building for years.

"I loved this family," Jesse continued, letting the tension leave his body, "To see them spilt so violently hurt. Adam left, came back then was kidnapped. You know, we tried to get him back, and you, until we were certain that you were gone. Then my life was dedicated to keeping the group together and fighting the Dominion. Some fight. They won. They got us to blow up Sanctuary, blow up the Helix and be separated from Adam. We spilt so fast, Emma. I'm surprised that Lexa and I even had time to…"

"Create Pierce, go on," Emma interrupted.

Jesse's slight smile was bitter as well as his voice. He continued.

"I got myself a life, a quiet peaceful normal life," he turned to look at her, "Sure, it's not easy being part of the Service, but I was good at it, wasn't I?"

Emma nodded. The past few weeks had been eating at Jesse. It was about time that he admitted it.

"You have a great life Jesse," she said.

"Had, Emma," Jesse looked at the floor, "All the time that I have helped people, I had Mutant X hiding in the background. Now, all I have is Mutant X, or what's left of it. At the same time, this damned power has made my life miserable. All I wanted was a normal life, a woman who loved me for me and the possibility of a child. Instead I'm a freak with an uncontrollable power, an ex-girlfriend who hates me and a child who wants to hurt me. Some dream life huh? All I have is you. The only thing I can thank God for. I wound up with your powers as well, and I can't even control that."

Emma stood up. The Jesse she had fallen in love with many years ago was the man standing in front of her. She had never once seen him feeling sorry for himself, she knew of his sensitivity to the being labeled a freak He had been hurting for a very long time.

"Yeah, I guess I have been hurting for a long time," he said aloud, "Sorry, I couldn't help but read that one."

Emma smiled. He knew he had done it, but wait, he had done it.

"Jesse," she got up and walked over to him, "You read it. You realize that your walls are down now, right?"

Jesse shook his head.

"Yep, they are, lucky me," his tone was still flat, "I can hear everything."

She lifted his down turned face by the chin to look into his eyes. The pain she met there was horrifying. He was angry and very lost.

"Jesse," she continued, "You can hear Lexa, can't you?"

Jesse looked at her. He had heard the fear and anxiety of Lexa the second the last bit of the wall was down. Lexa could hear him, but she had turned him away, the only return thought he had from her was not to let her hurt him. She was protecting everyone. For him to even try and reach her he kept seeing a closed door behind a blanket of light.

"She doesn't want me to help her," Jesse said, " And I don't think that I could if she would let me."

Emma didn't know how to reply.

Adam Kane looked at the two people in his medical lab and knew that he could wait no longer. Brennan had commed him that they had Henry Voight and were bringing him in. He knew it would be minutes until they landed and it had been an hour since Emma had grabbed Jesse's hand and gone completely silent. Jesse's life signs had remained steady and he had fallen into sleep after blacking out. Adam knew from earlier research that Jesse needed it more than he would admit.

He walked toward them hating himself for breaking the serenity of the moment, but he knew that he had to. He touched Emma's shoulder.

She opened her eyes and blankly looked at him. He waited. He knew it took a few moments.

"What?" she asked, her tone more angry than questioning.

"They found Henry, Jesse's life signs are fine," Adam began, "They should be here any minute. How is he?"

Emma looked down at her sleeping husband. He seemed peaceful, but she knew better. She smoothed the edge of the hair on his forehead.

"Wrecked," she admitted, "The walls are down. He heard Lexa then she pushed him away."

"Wow. I didn't know she could do that," Adam met Emma's sad gaze with a worried one of his own.

"He's got lots of guilt issues," Emma said, "He doesn't feel like he's helping in any way."

"We wouldn't have found Henry without him, doesn't he realize that? Without him we wouldn't have Pierce, without him we wouldn't have each other again," Adam said, looking at Emma, "Can you go back to him and let him know that?"

Emma smiled. Adam might not have the ability, but he knew when to say the right thing.

"Yes."

Emma leaned on the edge of the medical bed and closed her eyes. It didn't take long, but she knew that it had gotten worse since her moments of leaving. Jesse had sat back down on the edge of the pod, his eyes at the floor. He didn't speak, he just sat there and by the sounds, she knew he had done something she feared. He had burst into tears. She came up behind him and gently touched his shoulders.

"I'm sorry," she said, "Adam brought me out to tell me that they found Henry. Brennan and Shalimar are on their way with him. He also said you have to stop tearing yourself apart."

"He didn't say that, you did," Jesse said, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

Emma smiled.

"Yeah, I did and I'm right," Emma said, "Pull yourself together, Jesse. We're here for you."

"I can't control this Emma," Jesse finally admitted, "I can't help reading everyone, I can't help having people close themselves off to me and I can't even read my own son. It's great that you're all there for me, but I can't do this."

"Can't or won't?" Emma asked coldly, "You know how to do this."

Jesse glared at her. It was the first time she had been direct with him about the process. She had shown him all that she could. It was time for him to fly solo.

"I guess it's a won't," Jesse sighed.

Emma took his face in her hands. Her eyes met his.

"You can do this, I want you to do this on your own and remember this," she said, kissing him on the lips, "I will always love you."

Jesse took her in his arms and kissed her back.

When he opened his eyes, she was sitting next to him, her eyes closed and her face serene. He was back and ready to face whatever it would take to get Pierce and Lexa back.


	7. Back Step Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Legal Disclaimer-The characters all belong to Marvel, Alliance Atlantis, Fireworks and Tribune Entertainment. The situations were created by them, the actual locations…well, they're mine. That's why it's fanfic.

Author's Note: First off, real life decided that I needed a touch of writer's block, then work decided I needed to just sleep and save my creativity for them. Then, my health got in the way and I spent a few weeks working, eating then sleeping. So, what I am saying is, SORRY. Now, in turn, I am giving you a hugely long chapter to make up for it. Am I forgiven? God, I hope so. Also, as I review this myself, I have noticed that I am jumping from character to character an awful lot, please don't hurt me. Thanks. Now, read then do something I admit I need-Review!

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"_If you open your mind to me, you won't have to rely on open eyes to see…" Silent Lucidity-Queensyrche_

Pierce Kilmartin was asleep in a cell that was across from his mothers. He had woken for a short while then fallen back asleep, a condition which concerned his captors enough to have them to put monitors on the child, but not to wonder exactly what he was doing while he slept. His face was serene, his position that of a child in the deepest form of sleep, but if they had taken a moment to realize it, Pierce knew everything that was going on around him. The little boy had grown to let his size confuse people. By a simple, childlike way of speaking, he could manipulate the situation till it worked for him. The voices in his head though, were a whole other story. He could feel the fear radiating off of Lexa. It fed an anger growing in him that made him want to scream. The years he had spent in the pod were catching up with his mutantcy. He was going to get even with those who hurt his family.

He opened an eye in the darkness. Finally they had turned the lights off that surrounded Lexa, giving her some mercy from the overload they were working on. What they didn't know was that Pierce was awake, ready and would protect her. He was beginning to figure out how and knew that if he tried, he could contact Jesse. Hopefully Jesse would hear him.

Jesse Kilmartin had opened his eyes to a world of voices he knew that he could filter out. His wife had given him the logic he needed so badly, showing him that there was a time when you simply just did what you had to. He knew that now as the walls he had built around his mind had solidified. He could handle all of this now. He knew it.

He looked over at his sleeping wife, kissed her lovingly then turned to look up at Adam Kane. His mentor and friend stared back at him.

"How you feeling?" Adam asked.

"Much better," Jesse's face broke into a slight smile, "I know now that I can handle it."

Lexa Pierce awoke again to the world of unfiltered bright light. She knew before she opened her eyes that the light had not shut off, but if she opened her eyes, she knew that it was only to try and figure out her situation once again. Her thought was of her son's survival more than her own, and she knew that he had to be alive, because if they had taken them both, they had an idea of using him to torture her. She could handle it to a point, but if they wanted her to see them hurting him, they would have to turn the lights off.

She breathed in and opened her eyes. The light shut off as she did it. The show was about to begin. _Damn._

She secretly hoped that Jesse had used his energy to get to Pierce. She had felt him try to read her thoughts, like a television screen turning on. She wanted him to go for Pierce. He had the bigger connection to their son, and she knew that he would go for it. She felt his frustration when she closed herself off to him, but she had to. They needed to help Pierce, he was the important one.

Her eyes started to adjust to the lack of light. Pierce was asleep in a cell across from her. At least she hoped he was asleep.

As the blue eyes lightened and returned to reality, Jesse Kilmartin knew that he would be okay. This time, the voices didn't hurt. He knew as he looked at his quickly arriving friends, he was ready. Jesse looked at his friends, including the newcomer, Henry, and knew that he could hear their worry and concern, but much like when he was massed, the voices didn't touch him. He had the one thing he had begged for, complete control and he knew that this time, it wouldn't fail.

"Hi guys," he said, finding the strongest voice he could, "Henry, I think they called you in a little late."

"I'm here to help, Kilmartin," Henry smiled at him, a real genuine smile, the first Jesse could remember even seeing off the psionic, "You seem to need a little of it, but, from what the others have told me, you're much stronger now."

Jesse looked at him then let his gaze shift to his friends. Brennan was strong as ever, the friend he knew had his back in any situation, ready for anything. Emma, who had opened her eyes, now looked back at him with more love shining in her eyes than he ever remembered. Shalimar gave him a grin that he longed for while Adam, standing behind the group gave him the one look he knew he needed, a look that simply said 'I'm Proud'.

He slowly moved his legs over the side of the bed and began to pull off all the monitors that Emma and Adam had placed on him. He could do this, there was no weakness like before and he knew that he was in control.

"Thanks Henry," Jesse replied, "You have any ideas on how to get to Pierce and Lexa? She pushed me out when I tried to contact her."

"You have something of hers?" The older psionic asked, sitting on the edge of a chair, "Since I haven't met her in person, it would help to have something of hers."

Jesse reached for the comm. ring on his finger. She had held onto it when they were separated, and that was the only thing he knew still held her essence. He handed it to Henry, their fingers touching. He instantly got the image of Henry helping them to prevent any harm coming to his own children, and the image of him very proudly watching his own son play the violin. Henry's other motives were overwhelming. They ran his passion and Jesse knew it, felt it and was struck by it. The man who had caused many of his fears to come back in Technicolor was a father. They both had the same goal, saving their sons and the future.

"Congratulations on Joshua," Jesse said softly, "And do what you can."

Henry met his eyes. He found himself walking down the long hallways of what seemed like a warehouse, and he was following a track of light that only he could see. Since he usually could find someone by touching them, with results being instantaneous, he didn't know if it would work. Turning a corner that he felt was the right one, he opened a door, entering a dark room. A body hung from a grated cell. As his eyes adjusted to the light he slowly found himself staring at the handcuffed Lexa Pierce.

He knew instantly that this wasn't a dreamscape of his creation, this was her nightmare. She was cuffed to a wall, her body spread eagled and covered in bright lights. From her breathing, he could feel that her power was building up. Her eyes were shut, she seemed asleep so he knew he was in her dreamscape. He tread lightly. While this was a place of joy and of nightmares, he was hoping to keep her in a happier state. He knew that she was in trouble and this was her only escape. He didn't want to interfere with it, but needed the information to help find them.

"Lexa Pierce," he asked quietly, trying not to scare her as he woke her.

She didn't move, just moaned when he mentioned her name. Henry started toward her, wanting to touch her to solidify her connection with him. One touch and he would be in control. A control that he knew he could use. His fingertips were just about to touch her forehead when he felt a presence behind him.

"She's not going to wake up mister," a voice said behind him, "You might want to stop that assault."

Voight turned to stare into the honey colored eyes of the person he could only imagine was Pierce Kilmartin. The boy stared back at him, the child's bravado backed with an extreme amount of power.

"You must be Pierce," he said, kneeling to meet the boys eyes, "I'm here on behalf of Jesse."

"Yeah, right," Pierce replied, "How do I know that? People have us, mister, and I'm not letting anyone hurt Lexa."

Henry stopped for a moment. Pierce's terror was an easy yet fascinating read. The child had been through so much already, he wasn't just giving him a line, Henry knew there was a truth to what the kid said. He had to tread lightly, but he needed the big guns.

Outside of Lexa's dreamscape, Henry was sitting in a chair in the new medlab next to Jesse and Emma. They had wanted to put monitors on Henry, knowing it had been a while since he had gone into a dreamscape, they wanted to make sure that he didn't burn himself out in the process. Henry protested and got his way, knowing that they cared was a bonus though. They still were connected to him, but through age, their help in getting Brianna back to him and extreme self control he wouldn't hurt them or control them unless he had to. He was aware of them nearby though, Jesse's fear of losing control coming to the forefront. He knew that the younger man wouldn't lose it this time, there was too much power behind him, and that power was drawn from the love of those around him. He was unstoppable.

He reached out to where Jesse sat and grabbed his forearm. In seconds, Jesse passed out. In heartbeats, Jesse was standing next to him in Lexa's dreamscape. Jesse blinked, his eyes adjusting to the light. He knew at once he was in a cell, he could feel Lexa's fear coming over him in waves, but he knew she was out cold, and he knew that waking her was not the right idea. He realized instantly the other fear, more of a rage running over him. Pierce was in front of him. The look of anger on Pierce's face was very real. He didn't trust Henry.

"Impressive trick," Pierce said, "I don't know if he's real or not. I don't trust anyone in my head but me. Or Aunt Emma."

Jesse took a moment and breathed in. It was a shock to be dragged into someone else's dreamscape like that, but for Henry to do it was amazing, and also a power drain. He could 'hear' it the second the man had touched him. He silently thanked him and looked toward the small child that was bravely between them and Lexa. Pierce's voice was something he wasn't expecting and he was overjoyed to hear it.

"It's not a trick Pierce," Jesse said, "Henry's one of us, and he's here to help get you and your mom out of here."

"Mom?" Pierce asked, his voice a bit shocked, "I know you're not Jesse then, you haven't called her my mother. Ever."

"It's about time I did," Jesse knelt to meet the young boy's eyes as well, "I'm your father, but I think you already knew that. I'm here to get you and Lexa out of here."

"But how can you, you're in my head," Pierce pouted," Last thing I remember is that you couldn't talk to me anymore with your head. That was after you took the memories of my friends, Jesse. You also told me that I can't talk to you with my head anymore, I'm supposed to actually talk."

The kid was right. He had been idiot parent, telling the child that what he did naturally wasn't what was needed. After he kicked himself he knew that he would have to have a long talk with him when they got both of them back.

"This is one of those times where you can talk in your head, Pierce, I have no problems with that, let me when I try it, okay?" Jesse put his hand out to the boy who looked at him with anger, "I'm not going to hurt you. Not like the last time. I hurt you and I can't forgive myself for it until you forgive me."

The angry looked softened. The child couldn't argue the logic. He took Jesse's outstretched hand and let Jesse pull him into a bear hug. Jesse felt himself tearing up and knew it was okay to cry, this was his child. He took another deep breath and pulled back.

"Whatever happens, Pierce, your mom and I love you, as does Aunt Emma, Uncle Brennan, Uncle Adam and Aunt Shalimar, you know, right?" Jesse said, "We're waiting for you back home, and we're coming to get you. I just need to know where you are. Do you have any idea?"

Henry strained under the link. He had used his abilities regularly since the team had put him underground, but he knew that he couldn't hold his own link to the dreamscape for much longer.

"No, it's just a bright room, but Le..I mean Mom knows the guy who is holding us," Pierce continued, "You might know him."

"Jesse," Henry interrupted, "I can't hold this much longer."

"Pierce," Jesse said, giving Henry a look that begged for another minute, "I'll be back for you. Just remember to let me in, and let your mom know, okay?"

Pierce nodded and grabbed Jesse for another hug.

"I will, Dad," he said, as his image faded from Jesse's vision.

Henry gasped as he came back to the reality of the med lab. Jesse was wide-eyed, staring at him, determination mixed with gratitude. The others had seen the scene happen in heartbeats, Emma not saying anything, but her anxiety making it hard to not figure out what was going on.

"Thank you," Jesse breathed, "You don't know how much this means to me."

"I do," Henry said, "Now, let's get them out of there. You go to work, you get to Pierce, son. You can do it."

"But how," Jesse said, "The last time I tried to reach him, he wouldn't let me in."

"Think about it, the time before that you ripped memories from his mind," Henry's reply was firm, yet softened by his own witnessing of the memories, "He was hurt by that, but he's young enough to heal from it quickly. He'll let you in this time."

Jesse sat in a nearby chair, smiled and closed his eyes. As he felt himself pulling to center, the roomful of people raised eyebrows and questioned what was going on.

Henry noted the anxiety then spoke to them.

"I reached Lexa to be greeted by a most powerful young man," Henry began, sitting on the medical bed, "Jesse here has quite a son. He didn't believe that I was a good guy…"

"Imagine that," Brennan interrupted sarcastically, the grin in his eyes letting Henry know it was all right.

"So, I brought Jesse into the link," Henry smiled back at Brennan, "Jesse's going to contact Pierce now, and I am going to take a nap, that took a whole lot of out me."

Adam found a pillow and a blanket almost immediately. Henry took them with gratitude then curled up on the bed. He was out in seconds while Jesse closed his eyes and let his mind go.

He stood once again in the dank cell that he knew was home to Lexa and Pierce. He noted the smell, still waters mixed with fear. Instinct took over when he realized that Shalimar could get her out, while Brennan would probably electrocute himself thanks to the water involved. He noted the kind of lights that were illuminating her body, knowing if he was able to find the supplier, he might be able to track their location that way. He let himself in fully, hearing the thoughts of the guards outside and knew that she was awake now. He could hear her thoughts as she came to.

"Jesse?" she asked softly, knowing that if he answered, she wouldn't be insane.

'In your head, Lex,' he replied, 'We're coming to get you and Pierce, don't worry about it. Just fight the overload they're planning.'

Lexa shuddered. The lights on and off were messing with her own deep control. She knew she could bend the light, make her self hide in other spectrums, but the lights on then off, which had been happening for hours now was messing with her control. The headache this usually caused was vibrant and painful. Jesse did what he could to send her calm thoughts, but he knew she was in trouble. She would blow soon, her control overloaded.

'I'm going to Pierce now, we'll get you out,' he put a hand on her shoulder then turned to meet the child he knew had come to meet him.

'Hi there,' he said, blue eyes meeting honey ones, 'Sorry to keep you waiting.'

The blond child ran up to him and hugged his waist. Jesse felt the fear behind the hug instantly. Pierce was projecting everything that he could to keep Jesse there, with him. It would work, but he needed everything he could think of to put a name to the place that he stood in.

'Hi there and thank you for letting me in here, Pierce,' Jesse said, kneeling down so that he could face the child at eye level, 'You were very brave with Henry.'

'He's very powerful,' Pierce replied, 'You didn't think you could reach me did you.'

Jesse tried not to sigh. Pierce had read him like a book.

'Yeah, I didn't think I could,' Jesse admittal was freeing, he knew he could now, as a matter of fact the effort this time wasn't taxing at all, 'I'm here now though and I need you to take me around what you know, Pierce. Like when we first met. Is there anyone here like…us?'

He had wanted to say "like you" but he knew that this time, that meant both of them. He had spent years being just Jesse, the passive mutant, but this time, he was armed.

Pierce nodded no and pulled on Jesse's hand. The duo walked around the rest of the cell, Pierce pointing out what he could about Lexa's situation, and his own situation at the doorway. There were cameras everywhere. They were set in a secure zone, no windows to speak of. Jesse could only 'hear' the security outside of the cell, but he felt someone coming up the hallway toward them. Pierce felt it as well and disappeared.

"We're not alone," Jesse said aloud, making Emma jump. She had stood there staring at him, knowing that she would jump in if he started looking like he did before.

Jesse phased into the cell that Pierce appeared to be sleeping in. He looked at Pierce and touched his forearm. Pierce opened his eyes as the door opened, revealing the "Director". Jesse tried not to gasp then opened his eyes, returning to the reality of the medical lab.


	8. Back Step Chapter 8

Back Step-Chapter 8

Legal notice-This is fanficiton. Thisis not for profit and intend no work upon the copyrights held by Marvel, Alliance Atlantis, Fireworks or anyone else connected to the production of "Mutant X". This should satisfy your attorney, right? Please don't sue me, I don't have money for you.

Author Note-Hey there. It's me, your humble writer asking the following-Reviews? The usual cast of characters has left me in the cold. Sigh. I miss you guys. For my new reviewers-MutantX fan, thanks for the not so subtle kick in the pants. I know, I know, but I like I said, I can't do anything when real life invades. Will she overload…muhahahahaha….

Here's the next chapter

Jesse's eyes flipping open was the first thing that convinced Brennan his best friend was back. His massed fist nearly hitting the med table that Henry rested on was another. Jesse caught himself as his fist came down and tried not to yowl in frustration. He grabbed his friends fist, almost regretting it, but very thankful when the molecular stopped and glared at him.

"Chill man, you don't want to mess with Henry," Brennan said, under his breath, "What happened?"

"I got in contact with Pierce," Jesse said, "Thanks to Henry, he reconnected the link. Pierce is terrified though, and he pushed me out when their captor came in. I saw him though."

"Who is it?" Adam asked, from his perch in the medlab shadows, "The Creator?"

"No," Jesse replied coldly, "You remember the director of the Dominion?"

Adam nodded. The man wasn't like the Creator. This man followed every order the Creator issued, but he knew that something had happened the day that the Creator told Adam that they were going to work on something together, without the mysterious man's help. He had called the man "The Director" but all that Adam could remember was the look of Jesse and Lexa when they had been rescued. The man was vile and hated mutants of all kinds. He saw them as the genetic abnormalities that needed to be manipulated or pulled from the planet. He knew that the tests that the Creator was doing in putting together an army would work to anyone's benefit, anyone with the largest checkbook.

"He has her, but I don't believe he knows exactly who Pierce is," Adam calculated, "You know that the Creator kept Pierce's existence very secret."

"How much does he really know about Lexa?" Jesse asked, "Does he have the database?"

"It's a limited one why?" Adam replied.

Jesse swallowed and took a very deep breath. The fear that had radiated off of Lexa was of overload, something that they had talked about only once. He knew that she had too much light in her system, the results could be disastrous. Her powers of light uncontrolled could not only cause harm to those around her, but also to her sanity. She had feared losing it on someone, causing them harm would hurt her more than she admitted. The guilty deserved it, the innocent she would remember for the rest of her life. He feared what she would do if she was uncontrollable.

"They have her cuffed to metal in cell that is filled with unbelievable amounts of light," Jesse began, leaning on the edge of medbed where Henry slept, "She's fighting off the effects, but I think she's losing it. They're trying to deliberately overload her power Adam."

Shalimar grabbed a hold of Brennan's arm. While she listened to Jesse describe the room her friend was in, she knew that overloading a power was a horrible way to be tortured. Lexa was extremely strong willed, but Shalimar feared that she could be broken and hoped to never see that. Brennan remembered a time when they thought that his power was going to kill him and prayed it didn't happen to her. They had all been through a lot with her.

"She's been gone over 48 hours, so that means, she only has about 24 left before," Adam thought aloud, heading for his computer, "Guys, we have to go in and get her out of there. Jesse, do you have any idea what kind of light they were using? Any idea of where they are being kept?"

"Pierce could only figure out a warehouse, at least that what he keeps showing me," Jesse continued, his gaze on the wall, not on his friends or his wife, "They have no light source other than the ones they are using on Lex in there, and they also have water surrounding her."

"So, this guy knows how we work," Brennan said, "Me and water won't mix, so I can't go in to get her."

"Yeah, seems like he remembers you," Jesse replied, "He doesn't know about this new thing with me yet, and I know that Shal can tear the place up if need be."

"Screw the need be, Jess, we need to be in there now," Shalimar said, "Adam, what about places that the Dominion used as a front, maybe he has them in one of those."

"Maybe," Jesse thought aloud then went to the computer bank outside of the med lab. He started typing furiously, then came up with a photo. He closed his eyes, typed more on the keyboard then opened his eyes. He smiled.

"Good boy, Pierce, good boy," he said as the rest of the team joined him.

What the little boy did was what any little boy with an extreme telepathic gift would do. He sent the one person who could hear him the best description he could of where they were by putting the pictures in that person's head. Pierce had been scared to do it before since both Jesse and Emma had told him that he had to talk to the people around him, he couldn't send them thoughts since not all of them were able to send them back. It made perfect sense to him. Jesse saying it was okay had released a tide of pictures to the older man, half of which he expected, some of which took time to figure out.

The image of the warehouse was better defined by Pierce, because once he calmed down, he could remember when they put him in the van with Lexa, he could barely remember them grabbing him, but he had come to when they pulled him from the van. Through half open eyes he had studied the place, making notes of where it was if he went for a walk in his mind. He had to know how to get back to his body, just in case.

They were a distance away from the playground where they had been taken, but deeper into Virginia. Pierce had seen a mountain range, a radio tower with letters on it, and what looked like water symbols on the front of the building. That image he sent to Jesse, using everything his young mind had to make it work. He needed to make it right with his father, and Jesse felt that along with every image. It was good to get the message calmly, and not have Pierce's emotions overwhelm him. Jesse knew the little boy was scared, but his calmness with the message made it clearer to him. They were going to have to work on that when they got Pierce back.

Jesse stared at the picture in front of him. He loaded it into a picture finder program which he then uploaded to the internet.

"What's going on, Jess?" Brennan asked, "You bolted out of there."

"Oh, sorry," Jesse turned to meet Brennan's worried eyes, "Pierce kept sending me this image, so I put it together. I think this is where they are."

"Think or know?" Emma asked as she walked in, "You running a check?"

"Through all the major systems, yes," Jesse had grown quiet again, the program he ran it through would find the letters on the sign that Jesse had just simply created through the program he used, "This shouldn't take long."

The computer beeped as he looked at the screen. The water company in East Ridge West Virginia played across the screen. It matched the images that Pierce sent him. They knew where they were. It was time to go get them.

Time wasn't their friend. The lights had gone on in Lexa's cell once again, even as the Director entered. She knew as he entered that she didn't have much longer, the power kept building over and over again in her head, causing a headache she hoped to never have again. The pain built as the subdermal governor caused her hands to tremble.

"Ah, I see the timer is working, Ms. Pierce," The director touched her hand, "How's the tan coming along?"

Lexa tried not to scream, only to laugh. While the tan was an expected line, the constant battle with light was not. She knew if she tried to refract it, she would have more pain than the constant build that the light was giving her, thanks to the governor. This was an extremely cruel torture, because if she could use her power, it was going to be very bright and painful to whoever received it. She only hoped that she could do it the Director right then and there. She wouldn't mind taking him out and showing him every single property of the refraction of light. It would be her pleasure.

"You know, if I take that governor off, you can control all of this a little better," he said, walking back and forth in front of her, "I know you want to have the pain stop, don't you."

Lexa nodded. It was somehow okay to state the obvious; besides, the thought of speaking right then wasn't something that she was into. Her head hurt. Badly. The Director produced a pair of dark gloves which he put on her hands himself.

"This actually isn't for you, it's for those who get to handle you soon, Ms. Pierce," the man looked at her face and smiled, "This actually will keep the light in, not out."

Lexa took a moment. While he was trying to overload her, she couldn't grasp what he was getting at. Then, like a lightning bolt it hit her. They were going to use her as she overloaded and it seemed like he had sold her to the highest bidder.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, her voice still but the intent buried in the effort.

"Because I can, Ms. Pierce," he continued, turning her face toward him with one hand, "You and all of your mutant friends are initially products of The Creator. Since the Dominion funded him for a number of years, we own all of you. You're our product."

"But I am a human being," Lexa muttered, her eyes barely opening, "You know you can't do this."

"Don't try the pity angle on me, Ms. Pierce," he met her eyes, "You wouldn't respect it in yourself. You're taking out someone we want you to."

Lexa closed her eyes. It made sense. They overload her to the point where she can no longer be helped then put her in a place where the team can pick her up. She would then explode, taking Adam and the rest of her friends with them. She couldn't have that happen. He had something else in mind. Telling her he wanted to take out Adam Kane would have her blood pressure spike and her power would intensify. He was using mind games to control her even more. If that pain would stop, she might want to believe him.

"Anyone but them, please," she asked, "They don't deserve to die because of me."

"They will die because of you, Ms. Pierce," the Director said, "But maybe not today. You're to take out the President."

"The President?" Lexa asked, "She'll see us coming. She knows Adam."

"Yes, and when you overload, she'll see him for the last time," the Director smiled.


	9. Chapter 9

Back Step-

Legal disclaimer-Okay, so I don't own them. If I did, we would have a fourth season.

Authors Note-I owe all of you a huge apology for not posting stuff sooner, but to say that real life invaded would be more than a misnomer. I have been hugely busy with other things and frankly had hit a wall with this. Then season three restarted and I have been cooking since then. There will be more to this, I promise. Thanks for the patience, and if you can, review. PLEASE. Thank you.

Chapter 9

Henry Voight knew this rebirth of Mutant X was not the naive bunch of people he once met years ago. They were together and very much like a family. The teamwork he had seen during his visits through their nightmares was evident, but this new sense of urgency was also intoxicating. He knew helping them was something that he needed to do, to forgive the events of his past with them, and now, even after helping Jesse find Lexa and Pierce, he knew he couldn't leave them. His nap had refreshed him to the point that he would go where needed to help the team, both physically and psychically. Jesse had willing volunteered to let Henry into his subconscious, knowing he could boost the link to Lexa. What he would find of Lexa still scared him. Henry knew that the woman was on the edge of her control. He just worried about when she would break. He hoped not to be one of her victims.

He helped Jesse plot the trip on the Strand, looked back at Adam, then followed the team in. He found a seat in the back of the craft and closed his eyes. He would be ready for whatever they needed. He hoped to dream.

The Strand flew at the fastest speed that they knew it could fly. Brennan was in the pilot seat, having grown quiet during takeoff. Jesse sat across from him, his fingers running over the systems check, but also letting his mind drift toward the thoughts of Pierce and Lexa. Emma was a calm force behind them, Shalimar doing everything she could to not scream from the impatience of waiting. She was worried about Lexa, worried about Pierce, but happy that Jesse was finally together. She hoped that her frustration over not being able to help Lexa wasn't causing him trouble.

"It's not," Jesse said aloud, looking back at her, "and thanks for caring."

Shalimar smiled while Emma gave him a half-stare, half-grin.

"Jesse Kilmartin, hasn't anyone ever told you it's not nice to read other people's thoughts when they are right in front of you," Emma said.

"Sorry," Jesse turned back around to the consoles.

She was right, but it did feel good to have the team behind him. He took a second and centered himself again, trying to sense the link that Pierce had tried to build between them. Pierce sent the image of the director to him, then a closer version of guards to him. Pierce had gotten good at this form of message sending, but suddenly, his voice had gotten much clearer. He was speaking to Jesse in his own way. It also meant that he was sleeping, or drugged beyond belief. Jesse found himself thinking about when he first met Pierce, in his own dreamscape that Emma had built for him. The images of needles filled his inner vision and he shuddered.

"Jesse, what is he saying?" Henry asked, watching the younger man's eyes pale, knowing the look too well, but also jarring Jesse back to reality.

"They've drugged him because they are doing something with Lexa," Jesse said softly, "Brennan, how long until we are there?"

"Not long," Brennan said, his glance back at the controls, "You tell him to hang in there."

"He knows that," Jesse replied, "We just need to go in and get them."

Going in and getting them out wasn't going to be as easy as he hoped. Pierce was unconscious, made that way by the IV that the Director's people had placed only moments earlier. Pierce was playing possum beforehand, being wide awake while the others thought he was asleep. He was lucky that The Director hadn't figured out that he was one of the children from the Amish compound. That was the only luck on his side.

As they landed, Henry opened his eyes once again. He had felt the craft land, felt Mulwray switch into battle mode, heard Shalimar's pulse quicken as the doors opened and quickly glanced at the faces he knew would be looking at his.

"Go on, Kilmartin," Voight replied audibly to the question, "You and Emma go, I'll watch the homefires here."

Jesse's answer was a quick grin while Emma lightly touched his hand. Henry was making sure no one bothered with their way out. Jesse remembered Henry angry and smiled. Whoever dealt them a bad card wouldn't know what hit them.

The newly reformed Mutant X traveled out of the Strand as fast as they could, thankful of the cover of brush that Brennan had landed the Strand in. Shalimar was ahead of them, playing point was her best game, and she was in her element. Jesse followed behind the rest of the team, watching for any sign of the director's people guarding the water plant.

It was pretty quiet.

Brennan was ahead of them, motioning to them quietly to hide in plain sight. It wasn't that hard, considering the alleyways that led to the building, but something tugged at Shalimar's senses. She could smell the fear that radiated off of Lexa, her senses attuned to her friend. She let it lead her toward the building, and toward the back door.

The rest of the group followed her. She stopped as they got closer, motioning for Jesse to join her, pointing to the large wall. Jesse knew what she wanted without reading her mind, as he centered himself, took a deep breath in and felt the wall. The wall opened with his touch and he held it open effortlessly. The team walked through the wall into the dimly lit, abandoned water plant.

Shalimar kept following her nose and Jesse cast out for Pierce. He kept trying to find the child, but he kept coming up with the same blank screen. It was almost like the clear link he had turned to static.

Shalimar's hand pulled him from the fog of his attuned senses. She had stopped him, Brennan's eyes barely visible as they stared at him from a darkened part of the hallway. Jesse touched him, letting the message that Pierce was quiet gently flood into his thoughts.

_Damn,_ Brennan thought back to him, _where the hell is he?_

Jesse shrugged as Shalimar pointed to the door at the end of the hall. Jesse phased and ran through it, knowing that surprise would work in their favor. Emma had tried to stop him, but she knew as he did, surprise would work.

Shalimar took care of the door for those who couldn't phase through them and came upon the scene she feared. Jesse sat on the floor, cradling Pierce in his arms, checking to see if the child was breathing.

"How is he?" Shalimar asked, kneeling next to him, "Jesse?"

"Breathing," Jesse said, "From what I know he looks drugged out of his mind, but something is very wrong here."

Emma gasped. She looked across the room at the wall that only moments earlier held Lexa. She could still feel the essence of her in the room. She wasn't herself.

Brennan touched her shoulder. Emma was ice cold.

"You okay Em?" he breathed, knowing the look that came over her.

Emma nodded no and tried to hold onto the images that passed behind her eyes. Lexa had held on as long as she could, but the constant exposure to light had overridden her mind. She had blasted the wall behind Pierce, knowing that would cause the people who had her to drop him, which they did, and she had screamed to them that Mutant X was there and they were coming for her. She had become horribly irrational, and actually had blown out the lights surrounding them.

Jesse was the next person to touch her, gently on the wrist. Emma returned to reality. Pierce was in Brennan's arms, Shalimar was inspecting the room, and Jesse's look was a mix of confusion, pain and deep frustration at not being able to help Lexa.


	10. Chapter 10

**Backstep**

Legal Disclaimer-Hello Attorneys. This is fanfic. Therefore, there is NO money being made from this story. It's helping the author's sanity. Please understand that. Thank you.

Author's Note-So, you guys missed me. I missed me too. Mutant X fan, I appreciate the reviews, the guilt trips work to a point, but please, I can only take so much. Aniki, BJ, I love you guys, thanks for sticking with me. This is VERY dark. Enjoy it. I'm enjoying it more…

Chapter 10

The flight home was mixed with quiet and frustration. Pierce had come to for a few moments then faded back into unconsciousness, worrying the team. Emma had kept silent on what she had felt and seen in her vision, only focusing on the little boy that lay in her husband's arms.

The team knew that Pierce was the link and getting him out of there and to Adam as fast as they could might bring them the answers as to where Lexa was. They had missed her by mere moments and the frustration that brought was like a heavy humidity to the team. No one had spoken since takeoff, everyone lost in their own thoughts. Shalimar had joined Brennan at the cockpit, her hand on his arm keeping him calm. She had seen the look on his face of sheer frustration when he couldn't find Lexa. She found herself staring out at the passing clouds, wondering where Lexa was.

Emma saw Jesse through different eyes. She had seen her husband struggle through his powers, his gaining of control, but then the last few hours had hardened him. He was angry. He was also very lost. He had told her everything about how he felt about Lexa. The only thing he had never told her was how at home she had made him feel. The thought of her actually being gone, unreachable and possibly dead hurt him more than he would admit, and his guilt over what it was doing to his marriage was scaring him. He didn't have the words to explain it to her, but he loved Emma and he loved Lexa. She knew that just by the look he gave her from across the Strand, but he couldn't figure out his level of love for Lexa. Emma was still the fire in his heart.

Jesse looked at the boy in his arms and gently pushed the hair out of the boys eyes. He knew that Pierce would be okay, he could feel it, but he needed the boy to join them in the land of the living. Pierce was the last person to see Lexa alive. He would know what the people looked like. He might be able to tell them what they said to her. Jesse looked over at Emma and sighed. He wished he could have spoken with her before they got on board, she had seen something, he knew it, but her silence was hers alone. Jesse looked over at Henry, who had respected the silence and kept his eyes on the sky outside the craft.

Jesse's silence was echoed by Shalimar and Brennan. Brennan was frustrated. He knew that they had missed Lexa by moments, Shalimar had smelled the fear radiating from what they surmised was Lexa's jail cell. Something pretty horrible had gone down. They flew through the dim twilight back to Haven, Brennan setting the Strand down quietly, then hitting the edge of the craft in frustration.

Shalimar grabbed his arm. The familiarity of the couple enabled her to calm him with a touch, but the frustration ran down the edge of his spine with the electricity he controlled. He took a breath to calm himself then stood up. They were going to figure out where she was if it killed them. He then looked at Jesse with Pierce curled up in his arms. It almost had killed one of them. Not speaking, he helped Jesse with Pierce as they headed to Adam. Jesse could have read his thoughts; at that point Brennan didn't care. His focus, like the entire craft, had turned to the much too quiet child.

Adam took Pierce into their medical lab, placing the small body on the table and quietly asking Emma to help him with the initial exams of the boy. One glance at Jesse from Adam told him to go work on ways to find Lexa. Jesse took the unspoken command and went to the closest computer terminal to get to work. At least that would keep his mind off of Pierce.

"Tell me what you are feeling," Adam said to Emma, breaking the silence that the telempath had brought in with her, "Have you had anyhits off of Pierce?"

Emma breathed in for a moment then looked up at Adam.

"Not off of him, but," Emma found herself doing like Jesse, brushing the lock of hair that tended to fall into Pierce's eyes off his forehead, "Lexa blew. She saw them starting to drug up Pierce and blew the wall up behind them. They had to blast her with a tranq dart to get her down, but she wasn't there. It was like I was looking at some kind of animal."

Adam sighed. What he had feared had come true. Lexa should have been able to control the amount of light she was exposed to, given the right amount of rest and exposure. The study of the mutancy was something he wrote for a journal that had gotten him into Genomax. It was a theory, but to hear it had actually come true was terrifying. He hoped to hell that she wasn't completely gone.

The group had agreed with Pierce at least being observed, that they could take the time needed for their other major concern, Lexa. After setting the computers to interact with the ones inside the Strand, they headed back out to the site, hoping to see if any footwork would lead to clues on where to find her. Jesse knew that Pierce was safe in Adam's hands, but he still felt horrible leaving him.

On their way back, they had dropped Henry off at his home, a commlink in hand, just in case he ever needed their help. Henry had wanted to stay with them, but, as Jesse had pointed out, he had a family as well, and they needed him more. Voight didn't argue the logic.

Jesse had grown quiet since they left Henry. Brennan watched him from his co-pilot's seat, wondering how to approach him.

"You okay?" he asked, watching his friend's gaze go million mile.

Jesse turned.

"Sorry," Jesse mumbled, clicking a switch in front of him, "Didn't mean to zone out on you there."

"Understandable," Brennan replied, "We will find her."

"I know that, Bren, I know," Jesse said, "I keep thinking what if and I know that I have to stop that. I'm glad that we have Pierce and all, but, what if things had been different."

"Things are, Jesse," Brennan stated, "You found Emma, you got a life outside of Mutant X. Shal and I created our own life together. Lexa went and found a life for herself. We went on."

Jesse nodded.

"The anger and rage I felt toward her," Jesse said softly, "Five years is too long to be carrying it around. I should have confronted her earlier about all this."

Brennan didn't answer, he kept the controls steady and let his friend pour his soul out. He had seen the look of guilt cross his face when they couldn't find signs of Lexa. He knew that Jesse was blaming himself for the woman's disappearance.

"She knew that you cared, man," Brennan said, "She was as upset as you were, but you both share one thing in common now and forever."

"And thankfully, he's going to be okay, but I have to admit, I don't know if we're going to be able to get through to her," Jesse admitted, "From what Adam has told me about her overload potential, we're going to need everyone on deck when we find her."

"She's one of us, and deep down she knows it," Brennan met Jesse's distant gaze, "Don't worry bro, she'll be with us."

Without them, Lexa Pierce didn't know or care who she was. When the Director had decided it was time for her to leave her prison, she was beyond her breaking point. Her ability to bend light was in her genetic code, but her need for light was both physical and physiological. The amount of time she had been denied light had caused her emotional state to become irratic, yet something in her had protected Pierce. They had to sedate her to get her out, but her outburst over their medicating the child had proved to them she had a connection to the child. As much as the Director had wanted to keep the child, the men he had hired knew that she would be the bigger and harder prize to keep under control and had taken their punishments when Pierce's abandonment had been revealed. They really didn't like or care for Lexa now, and knew that with her emotional state, she was not a loaded weapon, but an explosive cannon, ready to go off at a moment's notice. She would have to be controlled.

They had moved to a hotel in Washington D.C. Lexa had been dressed like a business professional, drugged, and escorted to a room in the hotel. With the right amount of generosity, the staff had left the group alone, which in turn left Lexa to their will. She was fed regularly, but kept in the penthouse, in the darkness. They drugged her so she slept, they drugged her so she woke, and one of the director's people, a rare woman in the group, made sure that Lexa remained clean and ready for the right moment.

It was a dangerous job, but it needed to be done. At least that's what they were told and paid extra for. Lexa, on the other hand, didn't know where she was, and didn't care. As long as the drugs kept her sleeping, she didn't have to worry about light or dark. She usually was curled in a ball on the bed.

"Dammit, I wish I could reach her," Jesse exclaimed, frustrated as they looked over the cell again, "Every single time I have tried, it's the same door. She won't let me in."

Brennan stopped and looked around the room that they had vacated in a hurry. Jesse's frustration was understandable. He felt the same way.

"Guys, have a look at this," Shalimar called Brennan over, "You have any idea what that is?"

Brennan and Jesse looked down at the area that Shalimar pointed to. While the area that Lexa had been in was covered in water, the area where they had kept Pierce was covered in darkness. Jesse could see the outlines of a cot, a small light, and a blanket. They had kept him tied to the cot and Jesse inwardly shuddered.

Shalimar knelt next to the puddle and felt it. She then put a finger in it and smelt it. It was burnt.

"It's like she's burnt water," she said, "I never knew she could do this."

"Well, she can," Jesse added, looking down at the puddle, "We joked once about her being able to boil water faster than Brennan."

Emma, who had remained quiet the entire trip looked again at the wall where Lexa had been kept. Slowly and carefully she put a hand out to the wall and felt one of the cuffs that had held Lexa.

The emotions were overpowering and brought her into the horror she knew that Lexa had gone through. She had hung there, wallowing in her own self pity, blaming herself for the capture, and the other captures in her life. She knew that she had done wrong to Jesse by having the abortion, she knew that she was no longer part of the team, and her mentor, the only man who she could even consider a father, was a mere clone of a monster. She couldn't find a base, but she felt the fire that lit her blood.

As the lights would turn off, she could see the waves change. She wanted to blow off the extra energy that had built up but was frustrated when she couldn't. It had actually begun to hurt. The pain had been worse the more that she thought about it so she stopped thinking about it. She knew that eventually that would take her sanity, but if it would stop the pain, it was worth it.

Emma shuddered outwardly. It was as if Lexa was saying goodbye in her own way, very quickly. The images of Pierce fighting the men who drugged him then filled her vision and Lexa went crazy. She blasted the walls behind them, making sure that they dropped Pierce. She should be their one concern, not the innocent child that they brought with her. Part of her knew that the Director would use him as a pawn to get her to do what they wanted and she didn't want that. The distraction she hoped would work. She also left one image for Emma, that of the target.

Emma opened her eyes to Jesse facing her. She was on the floor, Jesse had her head in his lap, and his concern was totally concentrated on her. He was wanting to find out more, but he had respected her thoughts. The pain radiated there of not knowing what to do.

"You back with us?" he asked.

Emma nodded, unable to speak. Her eyes filled with tears. It always hurt to go this far in a situation, but she knew that she had to, and she had done it willingly.

"What did you see?" Jesse asked softly, "Please Emma."

"She did everything she could to hold on," Emma said, her voice breaking, "They want her to kill the president, and to stop the pain she's in, she agreed to it. She blasted them to drop Pierce, she wants him to know that she gave up saving his life."

Brennan, Jesse and Shalimar all looked at Emma. Lexa had given up.


	11. Chapter 11

Back Step

Legal Disclaimer-The following characters are owned by the creators of Mutant X, who in turn need to thank Stan Lee. There, I said it!

Author's Note-Yep, two days and I have another chapter for all of you. To clear this up, Mutant X Fan, you did NOT bother me, and no, I am not angry with you. Keep reminding me. I get busy and forget that this is all brewing and if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be writing, so thank you!

Aniki, I am evil. And I admit it. BJ, thank you for the ideas, you might see some of them incorporated in here. Muhahahaha!

Chapter 11

He hated making the phone call, but he knew it had to be done. It would be a back step into his old life, one that vanished the moment he stayed behind to help Lexa defend the man in the chair. It almost cost him his present life, but, he knew that he had to make the call. He had to protect the lives of others, that was the duty he swore to nearly six years ago. The problem was when he could make the call.

After watching Emma stretch her limits by having an empathic hit from Lexa, she was in shock and truly unable to converse more than what she had told them. One look from her told Jesse that the best place for her was at home. Emma had passed out in his arms only moments after her hit from Lexa. The emotion and sheer terror she had felt off the woman had left her drained. Jesse also knew the emotions of her team members didn't help. They wanted to know what she saw and what made her think that Lexa had given up. Jesse had carried her to the Strand, sat on the bench seat in the back with her in his arms and quietly told Brennan to go back to Haven. He would let Emma rest for the trip, but what she had said disturbed him. If Lexa was going after the President, it was to get back at Adam. He had left her when she needed him and the Dominion was no longer there to parent her as well.

Jesse sighed. Emma stirred in his arms and he shut his eyes. Gently he entered her mind, trying to find some sort of response from her. She was finally and utter asleep. She had found her peace and was floating in it.

Jesse left her at it and opened his eyes. They had landed back at Haven and he knew it was time. He would step back into the old life he once knew.

He was first out of the Strand, carrying Emma, Brennan and Shalimar not far behind him. He sent the clear message to Brennan that he was going to settle Emma in their bed then meet them upstairs. While the words were unspoken, the intent behind them was clear. No more games. It was time.

A moment of sheer joy greeted him when he finally made it upstairs to the main deck of their new home. While Shalimar, Brennan and Adam were talking at the table, a small blond flash flew at Jesse, engulfing his waist. Jesse gathered his son in his arms, picked him up and kissed his forehead.

"It is so good to see you awake," Jesse said softly, his voice breaking, "How are you feeling?"

"Much better," Pierce replied, his pale eyes meeting his fathers, "You missed me?"

"With every breath," Jesse replied, putting him down and looking toward the table, his silent thanks met by Adam's gaze. Shalimar met his gaze as well, she knew how badly he needed to see Pierce safe and sound.

"Where's Emma and Lexa?" Pierce asked, taking Jesse's hand.

"Emma's sleeping downstairs," Jesse replied, kneeling down to meet the child face to face, "You know that we are trying to find Lexa right?"

"Yep," Pierce stared at him, "Uncle Adam told me that she is far away. Is she coming back?"

"I hope so," Jesse replied, "We're going to try to find her, kind of like hide and go seek. You want to help us?"

Pierce nodded.

Jesse walked over to the table and picked up a pen and paper. Brennan and Shalimar watched the exchange with a mixture of shock and curiosity. Pierce sat down at the table and took the paper and pen from him.

"I want you to draw what you remember from when Lexa was with you," Jesse said, putting his hand on Shalimar's shoulder, "I know you remember a lot of what you saw, and I have seen you draw, Pierce. Draw everything, ok?"

"Okay, Jess," Pierce's reply was muffled as his face went down into the drawing.

"You keep drawing while we go and talk okay, buddy?" Brennan asked, getting up and motioning for the rest of them to follow him, "We'll be in the computer room."

"Okay," Pierce continued drawing.

Jesse leaned against the wall as they gathered. He was just beginning to realize how exhausted he was. He couldn't sleep yet, there was work to be done.

"What did Emma see?" Adam asked immediately, "Lexa was where?"

"Lexa's pretty much gone," Brennan replied, "From what Emma was saying she was unrecognizable, Adam. She blew the wall up behind the cell area where they were keeping Pierce, and from Emma's hit, she said something about going after the president."

"You see anything while she was going through it?" Adam asked, watching Jesse's reactions.

Jesse shook his head. Emma had remained a closed door to him and her exhaustion meant that it was an emotional drain. In protecting him and the others from the danger, she had overexerted herself. She wasn't going to be able to help them until she rested.

"She's out," Jesse replied, "She felt everything that Lexa went through Adam, and she said she gave up."

Adam stopped. Those were words he didn't want to hear. The thought of one his first mutants giving up on life and light was heartbreaking. He closed his eyes then opened them.

"That's not the news I wanted to hear," Adam explained, "You guys have any ideas?"

"Yeah, I do," Jesse replied, "I know that we have to get the service involved."

Brennan shifted.

"I don't think that's the best idea," he began, "The chances of them killing Lexa are pretty high, don't you think? I know they are your people, Jesse, but the fact is we don't know what Lexa will do if we confront her when she's like this."

"She'll be herself," Shalimar said, "She's always been professional, no matter what the cause, sane or insane. She'll be focusing only on the president, and we know her style. We know how she works."

"And that is our advantage," Adam said, watching Jesse's reactions to the conversation. It was obvious that the younger man was figuring out a plan.

"I was thinking that, but we have to move on this now," Jesse said, "Like it or not Brennan, they have to be involved."

He turned away from them and walked into the other room, then out to the outside deck. He pulled the cell phone from his pocket that he remembered to pick up when he put Emma to bed. He had almost forgotten the number.

"Secret Service, please remember that your call is being recorded," the voice on the phone began, "Kilmartin?"

"Yes, Joycelin, it's me, can I be put through to her?" Jesse began, leaning against the rail.

The line clicked then a familiar voice said, "White House."

"Robert, it's Jesse Kilmartin," he continued, "Is she available?"

"You're on the "put through at once" list Jesse," Robert replied, "Remain on the line for the President."

Jesse smiled slightly, he had forgotten how much clout his name still had.

"Where are you?" the voice on the line demanded, "You vanished off the radar, and even your superiors cannot find you, Jesse. Are you okay? Is Emma?"

"Yes, Ma am," Jesse began, "It's a very long story…"

While Jesse continued the story, Brennan, Shalimar and Adam discussed the situation. Jesse making the call to the authorities was one thing; their plan to protect the President was another. They all knew that Lexa was in killer mode. She was lethal. Shalimar had taken the side of waiting and seeing what would happen with Lexa, her feeling more that they could still reach her. At least that was the hope. Brennan was scared that she would be killed by some overzealous secret service agent. Either way he felt that they were screwed.

When Jesse had reentered the lab, after checking on Pierce, he knew that decisions were made. Brennan was upset, but more for the decisions having to be made. Adam was stoic, his usual enthusiasm dulled by the darkness in the room.

"So, what did Joyce have to say?" Adam began, "She believes you?"

"Yes, and we are now deputized to help the service out," Jesse began, "We're not to reveal our true names, so I get to produce covers for everyone, and they were aware of something going on with the Director. Kind of scary that she knew more than I thought she did."

"Joyce has always been that way," Adam said, walking around the lab and trying to find a missing program, "She have any idea where the Director is based? He has to have some form of funding to get where he is."

"Yes and no," Jesse replied, sitting at one of the main computers in the lab, "There's been some unusual activity at a local hotel, but, it looks like it's for a scientific conference, and she's going to be speaking at it at the end of the week. I suggested that she cancel, but she's set on it. Turns out it's about genetic research."

"God, its March, that's the annual genetic funding one," Adam sighed, "You're looking at about 1,000 sponsors to 10,000 doctors looking for funding. Sounds like the perfect place for a trap."

"Probably," Shalimar replied, "She still wants to speak, considering the viable threat?"

"That's Joyce Abernathy for you," Adam continued, "She always was the type to make sure that every avenue was covered for any form of election. Her speaking there will keep people into genetic research."

"She told me she was a big supporter of yours," Jesse added, "I didn't tell her you were alive."

Adam stopped, then turned around.

"Thank you, and that gives me an idea," he began, "Shalimar, do you remember your bodyguarding me during your early days with Mutant X?"

"Yes, why?" her brows knitted, "You think someone there is funding the Director?"

"I wouldn't be surprised," Adam countered, "You know that scientists tend to be cutthroat, and these guys want federal grants for everything."

"The question is who," Jesse added, looking up from his computer, "And I think I might have found the corporation that is."

"Who?" Brennan asked, walking up behind Jesse.

"Some outfit called Newbro," Jesse continued, "Based out of New Jersey, they are into genetic research to create the newest brotherhood of man. That's scary sounding. Their management says they are a privately held company and currently researching a cure to cancer."

"Don't they all," Adam interrupted, "Any names on that corporate sheet?"

"No, and that's surprising," Jesse's reply was followed by a flurry of further typing, "Their history is only a five year span. That's way too familiar and that's why I think that this might be our people. Let me run another check, I think they are based…"

One click put the end to the sentence.

"At the local hotel with the unusual comments," Jesse stopped, "I think we found them."


	12. Chapter 12

Back Step

Legal Disclaimer-The characters are theirs, the ideas are mine. HA!

Author's Note-Brigitta! You're back! I missed you, how was Turkey! The following chapter is for all of you, MX fan, Aniki, BJVision (yep, I answered one of those questions in here for you), and MX Babe. You're new here, and I thank you for your review as well. Oh, and a non-MX side note. I'm actually published in a magazine…Ghost Magazine, under the name Krys Cloud.

Chapter 12

Light became dark and her eyes opened. Strength came from somewhere, and it filled her with the ability to at least get out of bed and look around the room. She did that, stretching as she walked, letting the movement of her body help her center her thoughts and emotions. She was ready for whatever was next.

She turned and looked out the window. The lights of the city were enticing. She saw them not just as pretty lights on the velvet carpet of night. She saw them as the waves they created, and she wanted to put a finger out to them, feel the light, absorb it, and making it part of her.

Her fingers went to the window, the glass bringing her back to the reality that she was alone, it was night, and she wasn't able to touch the light.

Emma jumped and opened her eyes. She realized that she was in her room at Haven instantly; she realized she was alone, and then she realized that she had been connected to Lexa. Emma didn't see light as currents and waves; the only person she knew who could do that was Lexa. This was something she hadn't felt in years. She sat up and rubbed her face. The emotions of Lexa's disappearance had gotten to her, and she had to admit, so had everyone else.

She turned and got out of bed. Almost mirroring the dream, she stretched as she walked, and she knew that she felt more whole doing it. She found her shoes, slipped into them and headed upstairs. She knew Jesse was more than likely in the computer lab, and he needed to know the dream. They all did.

Once she got upstairs, she found Pierce still drawing at their dining table. In the days after they first rescued Pierce, they had discovered his love of drawing, but also knew that his drawing was not what they expected, it was a higher level of drawing. It was more intricate, the depth was unreal, and he loved to do it.

"AUNT EMMA!" Pierce exclaimed when he saw her coming up the stairs, "You're awake!"

Emma smiled. While it wasn't morning, it was still wonderful to be expected. She hugged the blond flash back as he held onto her. Much like Jesse had earlier, she kissed him on top of the head and knelt to get to his level.

"How's my favorite little boy?" she asked, "You feeling better? What you drawing?"

"Good," Pierce took her hand and lead her over to the table, "I'm drawing his for Jesse and Uncle Sparky."

He held up the picture that he had been drawing. Emma inwardly gasped as she looked at it.

"That's amazing Pierce," she said, picking up the paper from him, "Can I show Jesse and the others?"

"Sure," Pierce replied, starting with a fresh sheet of paper, "I'll draw the other stuff that Jesse asked me to."

Emma nodded and headed into the computer lab. Brennan and Shalimar were working on identification badges for themselves as Jesse was typing up even more identification files for both himself and Emma. Adam was hunched over his microscope in the other room, his attention so focused he didn't see her enter the lab. Jesse looked up as she touched the door.

"Hey, you're awake, how you feeling?" he asked, a smile crossing his face for the first time in hours, "You scared me there."

Emma smiled back at him. Whatever happened she knew that she could always trust him. She walked over to him and put her hands on his shoulders.

"I'm okay," she said.

His hand covered hers, and he stopped, turned and looked up at her.

"You remember anything else from your hit?" he asked softly.

"No," she replied, "But I just had a nightmare. Strangely enough, Pierce just drew the nightmare."

She held up his intricate picture. It was a scene of Washington that looked like it was from a hotel room. Jesse grabbed it from her and stared at it.

"That's the Roosevelt," he said, turning back to his computer, "The conference isn't too far from there, and for Pierce to draw this means…"

"He's got a connection to Lexa," Brennan surmised, "You think she's feeding him the image?"

"Consciously, no," Adam replied, "Subconsciously yes. It's amazing what our minds can do when we let them."

"So, something is still in Lexa that wants to communicate with us?" Shalimar asked, "Or is Pierce seeing something that we aren't?"

"I have to think that both are in play," Adam replied, staring at the picture himself, "Jesse, what do you know about this hotel?"

Jesse knew plenty. Part of the service's training detail was to know the layouts of most of the hotels surrounding the White House and have a good working relationship with the staff there. The Roosevelt was one of the hotels on the service's watch list, they knew that the hotel was somewhat legit, but could also function in the world of the non-legit. Such was the way of the hospitality industry.

He also knew the best way to sneak into the hotel was to check in. It wouldn't be that hard. They had the perfect couple in him and Emma.

Checking in was the easy part. The hard part was resisting the urge to have the service shut the hotel down. He knew that he would have to act cool, but this was his new home turf. Luckily, he knew that since he wasn't part of the hospitality detail, no one would know who he was, he and Emma could just be a couple on vacation. The reality was much different.

Brennan waited for them in the hotel's main bar. He and Shalimar were set up to be the couple meeting in the bar, then meeting the other couple to look like the locals taking friends to dinner. If they were lucky, no one would recognize them either.

Something didn't feel right to Shalimar. She couldn't place it, but something in the building bothered her. In her opening hug to Brennan she whispered in his ear, as Brennan pointed out the men in the bar who were definitely part of some organization. They didn't look like Dominion, so Brennan had observed them, not trying to bring any attention to himself while he waited.

Shalimar sat with him while they drank and waited for Jesse and Emma. Jesse had taken their luggage to their room, and turned to look at Emma. She had been quiet since they planned this journey, and he knew something was on her mind. It was time she got to it.

"Before we go any further," Jesse said, walking up behind her as she looked out over the city, "What is bothering you?"

"You," she said, taking his hands as he wrapped his arms around her, "You are so confident when it comes to an operation, it's scary. We could wind up killing Lexa tonight. You understand this, but you know that we won't. But, when you use your mutancy, Jesse, you are scared. I want to help you through this, I don't know how to and I don't know if you trust me anymore."

Jesse stopped. She was right, but there was more.

"Yeah, I know," he replied softly, "I know that you are there to back me up, Em."

"Yeah, but what you don't know is actually how powerful I am," Emma continued, "You remember that mission we had to save the pilot?"

"Yes, I do," Jesse stared out the window with her, "I remember it all."

"You do?" Emma turned and looked at him stunned, "You don't remember all of it, how can you?"

"Emma," Jesse looked deep into her eyes, "You broadcast the biggest fears of anything sentient within a ten mile range to protect us from being found. At the time it was the most terrifying experience of my life. You blanked it from my memory, so that I would never remember it. Only problem is, I lived that fear soon afterward. The memory of what you did followed soon afterward."

"When?" Emma's voice was barely a whisper.

"When you vanished over the side at Naxcon," Jesse's voice was hollow, "From that moment until you opened the door at your old apartment, I lived in a hell I don't ever want to go back to. Lexa was a light in my life, yeah, but she didn't hold a candle to you. I remembered what had happened the minute that you blasted me on your front doorstep. I lost you and a life I could have had, Emma, which hurt beyond any mental block that you could put on me. I was pissed at you for about an hour after I realized what you had done to me that day."

"Then you came back," she interrupted, "You knew why I did it."

"You wanted to protect me, and the life that we could have had," Jesse turned from her to look away, "I love that about you Emma. You will always protect those you love. I try so hard to do the same, I swore to do that the moment I met Adam. Losing you and him was something more than I could bear. I saw your face when you "died". Part of me died with you that day, and I swore at that moment to never have that happen again. When Sanctuary blew up, I was in that hell again. It took me getting here and into the service to finally get out of it once again."

Emma nodded.

"Then I found you," he continued, "I love you more than I can possibly put words to. I watch Brennan and Shalimar and realize that we have the same love, but at a deeper level. You understand me more than I understand you sometimes, but I could never hate you or be angry with you for wanting to protect us. You took Lexa into your life, knowing her negatives first, but seeing her positives and showing them to me. You let me see her less as the person who caused me years of pain, and more as the mother of my child, a child that you mother as well. Emma, I love you and trust you with his life and my own."

Emma couldn't speak. His words had found a place in her heart.

"Sure, I'm scared about what we're going to have to do, I always am," he smiled, "But with you, I feel invincible."

Emma knew at that moment that she too loved Jesse Kilmartin more than she could ever explain.

Jesse kissed her, a long, lingering kiss that she couldn't help but return.

He stepped back from the kiss, looked at her, and smiled, his eyes twinkling.

"If Brennan and Shalimar weren't waiting for us," he said, his thoughts filling in everything he wanted to say.

Emma laughed.

"But they are, we'll have to save that for another day," she said, grabbing her purse, "You ready."

"Yep," Jesse grabbed his jacket.

A thought mingled at the back of his brain.

_Darkness,_ the familiar voice cried_, I only work in the darkness, no more light. I can't take anymore light._

Emma stopped and looked at him. It sounded like a whisper to her.

"Lexa?" she asked aloud, watching Jesse's face change.

He closed his eyes and calmed himself to focus on her voice. Emma was with him at once, walking into his thoughts like it was a room in her house. Her felt her energy as he tried to listen to the voice, but it faded out.

"Jesse?" Emma asked.

Jesse's eyes opened.

"Call Brennan, get him up here," Jesse said, "She's in this hotel."


	13. Chapter 13

BackStep

Legal Disclaimer- The characters in the fanfic that you are reading are property of Alliance Atlantis, Marvel and the crew at Tribune Entertainment. The situation is mine that is why it's called Fanfic people. Thank you.

Author's Note- So…You like the past chapters? Muhahaha….This one's a doozy. Thank you again to all of my reviewers. You all rock. No, really, you do. MX fan-Addicting? Try writing it. My recent inspiration is a picture I found of Jesse with a jacket and a scary, yet mournful look on his face. Remember, this is a Jesse centric story, but, I did…well, read on and find out. Reviewing also helps. It helps keep me sane.

* * *

Chapter 13

Emma DeLauro Kilmartin sat in the center of their rented hotel room watching the scene unfold before her. Her friends and her husband were having a heated discussion about the state of Lexa Pierce. Jesse had heard a whisper of Lexa in the room, almost like she was speaking to him, about light and darkness. She hadn't made much sense, but to Jesse, it was the first contact he had heard from her in weeks. She loved him for his passion to help his friend but it was overpowering to be in the room with him when he was like this.

Shalimar gave her a glance as Brennan and Jesse loudly discussed the situation. She knew that they would work it out, but, they needed to figure it out. The mere thought of their friend here, a friend that her feral senses could sense on overload was making her jumpy, she wanted to help, but busting in there wasn't the right way. There was another.

Emma tried to shut all of it out and cast out for Lexa. If she was in the hotel, she would find her. It wasn't going to be easy, but she was going to find her.

It hurt more than she thought. Jesse was radiating frustration while Brennan was projecting it. She forced herself to clear the room mentally so that she didn't hear or feel anything that the group was doing until she could focus on the hotel. The sun was setting outside, so she concentrated on the lights coming up from the city.

As she looked at them, she realized that she was looking at them in currents and waves. Somehow she had gotten through to Lexa.

Shalimar noticed the change in Emma and watched her as she got up and headed for the window. Emma was glass-eyed, like she was in a deep trance. Jesse stopped as well, motioning to Shalimar not to touch her, but to follow what Emma was doing. Brennan caught on quickly and watched as well. Emma had walked to the window and touched it, tracing the light from the city with the barest tips of her fingers.

The part of Emma that stayed in control in these situations continued to monitor everything that she saw. She found herself taking mental notes of how she felt, what the room looked like and if she was alone. She wasn't, and the mood coming off Lexa's room monitor was one of guarded suspicion. Looking in the reflection of the window, she realized she was looking at Lexa's reflection, but her eyes weren't hers. The irises were clouded beyond color recognition. Emma shuddered. Lexa looked frightening.

_Talk to me_, _Lexa,_ Emma prodded with her thoughts, _I want to help you. I'm worried about you_.

The response was chilling and immediate.

_Stay worried_, Lexa's reply was hollow, _There is no hope for me. Protect yourselves._

_Where are you, we want to come get you_, Emma continued, _We want to help you._

Lexa's reflection started to shimmer.

_You won't find me, don't even try, Emma_, Lexa's reply was empty of emotion, _Tell Pierce I died._

Emma found herself coming to in Jesse's lap once again. He looked down at her, his face full of love and emotion. She knew that he had been in her thoughts, he had wandered in when she first saw Lexa in the reflection, but he hadn't made his presence known to Lexa. He just stayed in the background, making sure he was there for Emma if she needed it. When she had passed out, he caught her and gently laid her on the bed, putting her head in his lap. His fingers had gently stroked her face until she came to, only emotion coming from him being love and extreme tenderness. She could sense the sorrow, his voice catching at the raw emotion behind Lexa's last statement.

Brennan had watched the scene in silence, grateful that Jesse had softly told them everything that Emma was seeing, but realizing that while their being at the hotel only brought them closer to Lexa, it didn't bring them to her.

"We have to stop her," Shalimar said, "We need to find her and stop her."

"We need to, but," Emma replied, sitting up, "She's surrounded. She's also very much not herself. Her eyes were opaque."

"Opaque?" Brennan asked, "Is she being controlled?"

Jesse leaned back against the headboard. It was beginning to make sense.

"Yes, and not by drugs like we thought," Jesse admitted, "You guys remember when the Dominion had that device in her? I almost lost her when I tried to remove it."

Brennan thumbed his ring.

"Adam, what are the chances that Lexa's being controlled by mechanical means?" he said, bringing their mentor into the conversation.

"High," Adam replied, "We are talking about a group with the means and the motive. You guys manage to contact her at all?"

"Emma just got a hit off of her and it looks like we're dealing with Lexa in lethal mode," Jesse said, "From what I remember, the dampener that they had in her blocked all knowledge she had of her actions, but, she was pretty freaked when she found out about it. This time I think she knows."

"And she doesn't care," Emma added, "Jesse, she's in so much pain. They overloaded her so that all she wants to do is sit in the dark, the light hurts her but she's like a moth to the flame."

"So we can use light to get to her?" Shalimar asked aloud, "I don't like fire, but I went toward it when I needed to, is this what she needs?"

"Possibly," Adam said from the commlink, "Pierce has been asking about her, Jesse. I'm monitoring him in case she reaches him."

Jesse was silent. The little boy had been on his mind since they had left him in Haven, one small hand wrapped in Adam's. He knew he needed to go, but he hated to leave him behind. If Lexa was as far gone as they all feared, Pierce needed to never see that. The child had enough scars to deal with. His mother in assassin mode was something he wasn't going to permit.

"Thanks Adam," he replied, "Give him a hug for me, will you?"

"Already done," Adam smiled, "Guys do what you have to do, but proceed with caution. Lexa isn't herself and you already know she doesn't feel like she can be saved. You guys have to save her."

"Already done," Shalimar echoed the rooms' thoughts, "We're out."

Brennan had watched the proceedings and found himself staring out the window.

"We know she's in the building," he began, "We know they've paid off the staff to keep her location hidden. We also know she's awake. Guys, I say we move on it, now."

"I'm with Brennan on this one," Jesse replied, "We have got to get her out of here. If we can get her back to Haven, Adam can hopefully remove whatever is in her head. Emma?"

"She's here alright," Emma's voice had grown cold; "I would say penthouse level."

"Have all of your forgotten that it's nighttime?" Shalimar asked, "She's functioning better in the dark, guys, and she'd be the first to admit it."

"Then I suggest we go in, now," Jesse's response was cold.

* * *

Minutes later Jesse was on an elevator heading up to the top of the building. He came up with a simple recon plan of just going up to see what the top floor of the building looked like presently, and the maintenance uniform he had obtained from the closet was the biggest help he had. Emma had gone downstairs to convince the front desk that a maintenance man needed to be sent to the roof for an inspection, so there would be no confusion if the security staff upstairs had a question.

Shalimar had taken the stairs to the top of the adjacent building, her plan to have Jesse help her cross over to the hotel's roof. Jesse was heading for the roof first to retrieve Shalimar, and then heading for the most logical location to put Lexa.

From all of his training he knew that the top two floors of a building were usually the best place to have any sort of operation. A staff, be it government, military, or even press, had a tendency to buy out at least two floors of a hotel to make sure that the floors could be secured. At least that was what his gut was telling him. From his observance of Emma's experience with Lexa, he knew that they had put her on an upper floor. He leaned back against the wall of the elevator and closed his eyes for a moment. He knew he was running on empty, but he had a little more energy for this mission than he wanted to admit. The guilt he felt for getting into all of this was still nagging at him, and his early attempts to contact Lexa had bothered him more. He couldn't believe that she had blocked him out of her thoughts, but the idea of her being controlled electronically had made so much more sense now. He should have seen it, but emotions had clouded his judgment. He was ready to admit he missed Mutant X and knew that this was a life he still needed to be in.

He was surprised to see that no one was on the landing to greet him at the top floor. Maybe his hunch was right. He turned for the stairs he knew were at the end of the hallway to make it to the roof to find Shalimar. It was an empty hallway that met him and the eerie silence of the whole floor led to him to believe further that he was alone. He got up to the roof and opened the door. Shalimar had cat-footed the jump between buildings and was waiting for him at the door. They were fortunate that the hotel didn't have a roof camera, which Jesse said a silent prayer over, then moved down the stairs. Shalimar stopped him at the bottom of the stairs and then slowly opened the door.

While Jesse had scanned the floor only briefly, Shalimar's senses went on high alert. The smell of adrenaline, while naked to human senses screamed at hers. She could almost feel someone on the floor, and one sniff seemed very familiar.

Using hand motions that Jesse barely remembered, Shalimar motioned for him to move down the hallway. He shifted to thought mode.

_What are you thinking?_ he gently asked, his interior voice an easy switch.

_She's on this level, Jesse_, Shalimar nearly screamed in his head, _I can smell her_.

_Shal, wait, if she's here, we need to have Brennan here, and Emma_, Jesse calmly replied, _You know that._

Shalimar stopped. She could smell the edge of Lexa's frustration. She was there; she could feel it in her bones. Her eyes went cat yellow and she looked down the hall. The usual outline of Lexa went she refracted light wasn't where she thought it would be. There wasn't an outline, but there was a vibe. Jesse felt it as well, something was screaming Lexa, but he couldn't put a finger on what it was. It hurt to think.

_Center on my thoughts Jesse_, came Emma's calm voice through his thoughts, _we're on our way up._

Meet you at the elevator, he replied.

Switching to his own voice he whispered to Shalimar.

"Let's go," he said, "They're meeting us at the elevator."

Shalimar nodded and followed him. She still let the scent of Lexa flow over her settling in a trail that she could see. Jesse pulled her in the hallway across from the elevator, hiding in plain sight. Brennan and Emma were on the elevator, but they were playing the confused tourist by their looks at the floor. Jesse popped out for a moment then motioned for them to join him and Shalimar. Brennan slowly did and Emma followed her hand grabbing Jesse's to get a quick assessment of the situation.

"Go to it, honey," he whispered, "See if she's here."

"Shalimar was right," Emma replied, her eyes going wide, "She's here, three doors down, and she's guarded."

"I can take care of that," Brennan smiled, "Let's do it."

The plan seemed simple, but it was going to take the four of them working as a team to make it perfect. Jesse and Shalimar quickly headed down the hallway to the room just beyond the one that Emma identified as Lexa's. One touch and Jesse had the door phased to allow all of them access into the room. The room was quiet and untouched.

From the layout of the room they were in Jesse planned their attack. One hand on the walland Brennan could poke his face in and hit the guards. The next question was Lexa. The chances of killing her were high if Brennan hit her with several volts. Shalimar could immobilize her if she wanted, but they didn't want to cause her harm, and since Jesse would be busy with phasing the wall, Emma would have to hit her with a blast.

Emma knew it before it was suggested.

"I'll do it, and I'll try to keep her peaceful, but guys, we're fighting electronics here, I don't know how far I can go," Emma admitted and Jesse started breathing deep to center himself for phasing the wall.

"Emma honey, go broadband if you have to, I'll protect everyone," Jesse said, "Just do it."

Emma stared right back at him. The mention of broadband made her wince, but he was right. She nodded.

One hand brought the wall into a state of atoms. Brennan peaked through, put one hand out and in seconds had the guards twitching from sudden electrocution. He quickly stepped through and ducked, hoping not to scare Lexa who he knew was in the room. Shalimar came in right behind him as did Emma, with Jesse closing up the wall behind them like a zipper.

Lexa had her back to them, her silhouette outlined by the city lights. When she turned, her face was full of fury.

"I told you to leave me alone," she seethed, "Why did you come for me?"

"Lex, you aren't yourself," Brennan began, his voice even, "You don't want to be here."

"What do you know about me, lover?" she asked, "You don't know me, Sparky."

"I know you're tired of killing," Shalimar chimed in, "C'mon Lexa, you don't belong to these guys."

"I belong to myself, thank you," Lexa replied, "They're keeping me out of pain, Shalimar, can you do that?"

Shalimar met the blank gaze. She shook her blond head no.

"Then," Lexa replied, her hands going into the ready position, "Why don't you just take your friends and…"

Jesse grabbed Brennan and Shalimar's hands quickly and breathed in. The atoms in all three of their bodies went solid as the molecular massed them.

"Go."

Lexa's bolts bounced off Jesse, but his sudden expulsion of breath took Emma by surprise. She turned and tried to blast Lexa with all that she had, but it didn't seem to work. Lexa tried again with another bolt as Jesse breathed in, missing again, but hitting Emma as she tried to get into Jesse's protective grip.

Knocked unconscious, Emma fell limply at Jesse's feet. Horrified, Jesse screamed.

"EMMA!"


	14. Chapter 14

Backstep

Legal Disclaimer-I don't own, but if I could borrow them…

Author's Note-Yep. A real quick update. Couldn't sleep last night and I have today off. So, it's all good for you. Enjoy. Reviewing makes me very happy and I update faster…get the hint? Thanks.

* * *

**Chapter 14**

Lexa brought her hands back as Emma fell at Jesse's feet. Jesse's scream brought down his massed form and Brennan found himself struggling not to hit Lexa with a lethal blow. His long fingers went deep into a tesla coil. He was ready to when he heard the click of multiple guns behind him.

Shalimar, who had been protecting Brennan from Lexa's moving around turned to see a squad of guards behind them. Most of them carried weapons, all of which were pointed at Brennan's back, several were aimed at her as well. Jesse looked back at the guards, looked up at Lexa, and ran his fingers across Emma's face.

"I would recommend putting your hands up Sparky," Lexa said, a smile growing on her face, "And as for you Jesse…"

Lexa pointed a finger and a bolt hit Jesse in the center of his forehead. He dropped as limply as Emma had.

* * *

Brennan Mulwray hated the odds. He also hated himself for what he didn't do. Handcuffed in a hotel bathroom up to his shins in water wasn't beneficial to his powers. Matter of fact, it shorted them out. The frustration ate at him that he didn't take the seconds needed to immobilize Lexa, but he had to admit, he had a heart and wouldn't kill her. He was going to hurt her when he got his hands on her though.

Shalimar wasn't in too good of shape either, they had locked her in a dark closet, handcuffed to the closet rail. Brennan didn't see them do it, but they had left them in the same hotel room. Brennan at least could yell at her from across the room, trying to calm her down as she screamed. It was the only thing he could do.

On the other end of the hotel floor, Jesse woke to the harsh reality that light hurt his eyes. Light hurt his eyes, the brightness only enhancing his last memory of Lexa and the bolt she used to drop him. His next thought was Emma. He tried to lift his head, hoping that his head wouldn't explode as he sat up. Quickly discovering that he couldn't, he looked around the room. His head hurt and his wrists were behind his back, handcuffed to the chair.

"Wakey Wakey," Lexa's voice was childlike, "You sleep pretty well, Jess."

"You knocked me out, Lexa," Jesse said, looking toward her, "Kinda makes it hard not to sleep. Where's Emma?"

"She's alive," Lexa replied, "I know she's your first concern, honey. But you must remember that I am in control here."

"I think we all know that Lexa," Jesse replied, "Just let me know that everyone is okay. Brennan and Shalimar?"

"Locked up in the other side of the hotel," Lexa replied, coming up alongside Jesse and kneeling next to him, "They've been immobilized. I thought I told you guys, there's no hope for me, you shouldn't have come."

"We did what we thought was right," Jesse said softly, voice even, "You would have done the same thing, Lexa, if the situation was reversed."

"I don't think I would have, Jesse," she replied, turning his head so that she could look into his eyes, "I can't do anything to help you guys here. The Director is far too powerful. I was lucky that his security detail is scared enough of me to listen. They were drugging me until I got up last week. One dead guard and they were wondering how to control me."

"So, drugs aren't working?" Jesse thought aloud.

"Nope, they're not," Lexa laughed, a laugh that sounded more insane than sane, "Light and dark seem to be the best way now. Its hours until sunrise."

"What time is it?" Jesse asked.

"Time for me to let the Director know that you guys are here," Lexa said, "He'll be thrilled. But then again, I could wait."

"He'll probably wind up killing us or doing to us what he did to you," Jesse said quickly, "You sure you want that?"

"Why do I care?" Lexa replied, her fingers raking his face," You guys made the choice to come here, I told you not to and that's where my guilt stops."

"What about Pierce, Lex?" Jesse asked, hoping the name would spark something within her, "You think that he would like growing up without either one of us?"

"He was doing okay without us," Lexa laughed, "We've screwed him up more than the Creator ever did, Jesse. He probably did better living in a pod."

Jesse closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Getting furious at her wasn't going to help matters at all, she wasn't sane, he knew that she would use any and everything to hurt him.

"I don't think so, and I know you don't think that either," Jesse turned to look into her eyes, "Let us go, Lexa."

"Don't think I can do that, babe," Lexa smiled, "Not you, not Brennan, not Shal and especially Emma. You guys can be part of **my **team."

"Don't think that's gonna happen," Jesse spat, taking a deep breath and trying to phase the cuffs off of his wrist.

The headache that started instantly was a sick reminder of something he hoped never to experience again. He grimaced. It hurt. It hurt badly. It was the headache that was uniquely connected to having a subdermal governor attached to your spine. Try and use your powers and you hurt, you hurt worse than you ever imagined. Your powers, on the other hand, were rendered useless.

"You guys join me and I remove the subdermal from you," Lexa turned his face to meet his eyes, "Only had one and you were the perfect candidate."

"Great," Jesse muttered under his breath, "Where did you put everyone else? Where is Emma, Lexa. Tell me where my wife is."

"She's next door," Lexa replied, "She's out cold still. Turns out she got a little more of me than she expected, oops."

Jesse started to calculate. Knowing how Lexa's powers worked, that was unlikely, but not entirely impossible. If his telepathy had worked, minus the subdermal governor, he could reach her, but it was impossible. Thanks to that little hunk of machinery, he couldn't function as a team member. He had to think back to the training he had in the Secret Service. Rule one, never ever negotiate with an insane person. Try to stay calm.

"She's a fighter, Lexa, much like you," Jesse said, "I would like to see her though."

"In time, Jesse," Lexa said, "I need to know if you'll join me."

"Let me see Emma so we can talk about it," Jesse said, "You know how good she is at persuading the others, you want her as an ally in this."

Lexa stopped and stared at the hallway of the suite. Only seconds earlier it had been guarded. The guards had vanished at the mention of Emma, which bothered Lexa. She got up and headed for the door, trying to find out what was going on as Jesse's eyes followed her.

He screamed at her to let him see Emma. She ignored him. He begged her as she left him in the suite, alone.

Brennan shook with the horror of his own electrocution. Part of his mind imagined that he hadn't tried to shoot out the lights in the bathroom, but he had struggled against the spout of the shower and he had tried not to cover himself in the resulting waterfall. The other part smelled the burnt flesh and seizures that he had seen his victims suffer. He opened his mouth to scream and felt fingers go to his lips in an attempt to quiet him.

He opened his eyes. He was still in the shower, nothing had changed, but Emma was standing in front of him.

"Brennan," she whispered loudly, "It's me. You're okay."

Brennan stared at her. He was okay, the electrocution being the worst thing he had imagined since the guards had put him in the bathroom at Lexa's direction. He took a moment to breathe in and out, trying to regain some sense of calm, some focus.

"Emma, how?" he asked quietly.

"I'll explain later," she said, "Let me get Shal so we can get you out of here, k?"

Brennan nodded. Emma walked out of the bathroom and to the closet she knew the feral had been chained in. One thought and the lock opened to the door, revealing the occupant not only cuffed to the wall but unconscious. Emma knelt next to her and gently touched her face.

"Shalimar," she said calmly, "Wake up sweetie."

Shal's eyes opened and she sat up. Emma touched the handcuffs and opened them.

"Emma, how?" she asked echoing Brennan.

"Not now," Emma replied, "We have to get Brennan down then get Jesse."

Shalimar nodded and followed her into the bathroom. Brennan had waited there quietly. Shalimar yanked the shower nozzle off of the wall, enabling Emma to open the lock with a touch. The women helped him out of the tub and grabbing towels, helped him quickly dry off.

"You mind telling me what you did?" Brennan asked as he grabbed the shoes that the guards left.

"Broadcast worst fears out to the whole floor," Emma replied, "I knew that I could when Jesse mentioned broadband. When Lexa hit me it hurt, and it put me out. When I came to I played possum long enough to figure out what was going on. They thought I was in no shape to come to, so they left me with one guard."

"And locking us up made plenty of time for her to work over Jesse," Shalimar added, "You get anything off of him?"

"Yeah, and I don't like it," Emma replied quickly, "She's coming, guys, head for the other side of the floor, he's in the penthouse. I'll deter her."

"No, you and Brennan go get Jesse," Shalimar interrupted, "I'll deter her and meet you guys upstairs."

Brennan grinned.

They ran down the hallway to what seemed to be the penthouse door. The guards that had diligently guarded it were no where to be seen and Jesse could be heard screaming inside. Luckily the door was still open. Emma flew through it, much to the surprise of Jesse.

"God, I am so glad to see you," he said, tears forming in his eyes, "I don't think that I could have made it through that again…"

Emma knelt over him to psionically undo the cuffs,

"Sorry to do that to you Honey, you okay?" she asked as he sat forward and rubbed his wrists.

"No," Jesse said, "Where do we stand?"

"Shalimar's diverting her," Emma replied, as Jesse put a hand on the back of his neck, "Subdermal, huh?"

"Yeah," Jesse stood up slowly, "Let's get out of here."

"We're heading for the roof," Emma said, taking his hand, "Brennan's guarding the hall."

Jesse nodded and ran behind her. It still hurt like hell to move, but anything was better than witnessing Lexa this insane. They made it to the stairs that lead to the roof, Shalimar steps behind them.

"What about Lexa?" Jesse asked softly, "Any idea where she went?"

"I didn't see or smell her," Shalimar answered, "I think she went downstairs to find the guards."

"She'll have to go further then downstairs," Emma added, her voice cold, "Those guards are on their way home."

"But why didn't it effect her?" Shalimar thought aloud, "I mean she does get afraid of things."

"My guess is the mechanics in her head," Jesse said as they headed down the stairs of the building across from the hotel, "They're preventing any real part of her from coming through. She's gone insane."

"And I don't know if we can get her back," Shalimar replied.


	15. Chapter 15

Back Step

Legal disclaimer: The following characters are owned by others. They haven't done much with them so, I thought I might.

Authors Note: Yes, I apologize for the delays. I have been ill, they're still trying to figure out what is wrong with me, so, I have been doing a lot of sleeping and working, lucky me. One major thrill though, Forbes is back on tv, on a soap opera called "One Life to Live." His hair is long and I get to see him regularly! Whoo hoo! I do dedicate this one to Gelf, who I am worried about. I hope you missed Katrina sweetie.

Chapter 15

Jesse Kilmartin sat in the back of the Strand knowing that the decisions the group made in the next few minutes were going to determine the fate of his life in ways he didn't want to think about. He closed his eyes and leaned against the back of the seat, knowing they would get his input when they asked for it. It felt good to close his eyes, the sub-dermal governor that they hadn't removed still impairing his senses. For the first time in a very long while, he felt like he could let his guard down since it simply was down.

"You know, you could ask Brennan to take the governor off for you," Emma suggested, settling into the bench seat next to him, "Or are you preferring the silence?"

Jesse wrapped his arms around her. She felt quite whole to his lost state of mind.

"It shows huh?" he asked, a smile growing on his face, "It is kind of peaceful in its own sick way."

"Yes, I can see why you're thinking that," Emma said, settling into the crook of his arm, "You okay?"

"That's the same question I was going to ask you," Jesse's reply was a bit mocking; "You read minds or something?"

"Or something," Emma replied, laughing, "You want it off?"

"Yeah, I guess so, Brennan?" Jesse asked.

His friend turned and looked at him, a grin growing on his face for the first time in days.

"Yeah?"

"You mind doing the honors?" Jesse said, getting up to meet him, "I think it's about time my limits got disabled."

"Sure," Brennan put a hand up to Jesse's neck and with a fingertip, shot a bolt directly into the governor.

Jesse turned around to head back to Emma and realized instantly that something was very, very wrong. He couldn't see.

"Brennan, how long till we're home?" he asked quickly trying to hide the panic that ran into his voice.

"Five minutes, why?" Brennan turned to look at him.

Jesse's eyes had gone completely blank, the irises going a cloudy white. The molecular stumbled and hit the floor of the craft. Shalimar and Emma were at his side in moments.

"What the," Brennan asked, "You okay, Jesse?"

"Brennan," Emma said calmly, "If there's any way to get us home faster, do it."

Brennan turned and put the craft into overdrive. Shalimar and Emma turned Jesse over so that he was laying on his back, his eyes closed and his face a silent echo of extreme pain.

"Jesse, talk to me," Emma said, "What happened?"

"Emma, his eyes were just like Lexa's," Shalimar said, "Jesse, what did you feel when Brennan deactivated the governor."

"Nothing.at.all," Jesse spoke softly, enunciating each word, "God, what is wrong with me."

"Brennan, get us home now," Emma said quickly, "Adam are you copying this?"

"I'm waiting for you," Adam's voice rang out, "Jesse, hang in there, we'll figure it out."

Figuring it out was going to be the hardest part. Since the destruction of Sanctuary, the medical supplies that Adam Kane could get a hold of easily were short in number. He knew that something had been done to Kilmartin, but trying to figure it out completely was nearly impossible. What he needed was a good neural scan of Jesse's brain and neck, but that was not possible. He didn't have the equipment.

He looked at the young man who was finally sleeping. He was like a son to him, and one of his first rescues from Genomax. It had been nice to hear that he had finally gotten himself a life away from his mutancy, and he had been even more impressed at the man he had become.

Kane walked outside to where the rest of the team awaited his verdict. He took a moment to find the words to explain that there was no way he could help Jesse right now. He took a moment to find the right words, then had revelation hit him. Jesse couldn't see when they deactivated the governor, if it was activated it might at least reverse the process. It was also logical that the device that looked so much like the dermal governor that he created had been redesigned with a much more sinister outcome. He truly hoped that it would work.

Emma stared at the door as Adam entered the room. She had put Pierce to bed, hoping that the little boy wouldn't ask too many questions, her concern and worry over Jesse broadcasting over her nerves. Pierce had said nothing, making her a little calmer.

"What's going on Adam?" Brennan asked, handing the older man a cup of coffee, "Is he alright or what?"

"I had to reactivate the governor," Adam began, "That at least put what I think is a neural spike at bay."

Shalimar gasped. She remembered fighting Lexa when she was being controlled by one. There was very little chance of getting her back then, it had taken the miracle of Adam returning to the fold then to get her back to where they where. He was without his equipment though and he was lost. Shalimar could see in his eyes.

"Think is?" Brennan asked, his words echoing the thoughts running through the group's mind, "What is it that she put on him then, Adam, a neural spike wouldn't act like a governor would it?"

"In this case, yes," Adam sighed, "It's the first time I have seen something like this, and I admit, in rebuilding a base for you guys, I am not the most up to date on this, please understand guys. I am at a loss. I went with logic, and was able to at least bring his sight back and work on his pain. I won't even attempt to get it out of him unless I can have a computer to monitor my progress. That was the only thing that saved Lexa, skill and machinery."

"Okay, so what do you need to make this work?" Brennan began to make the list he knew that they would need.

"I need to get us to Storm King mountain," Adam began, "If there's anything left of Sanctuary, the computers there would help. Other than that, if there's any way that we could get Jesse a complete scan, that would help as well."

"Do you have any medical connections still Adam that could be used to help find this out?" Shalimar asked, "I don't want to spilt up our forces, but if we could get Jesse into a hospital…"

"We need the cover," Jesse interrupted from the doorway to Adam's makeshift medical lab, "I know the way, but you guys have to remember that we still have to stop Lexa. What has she done to me, Adam?"

Kane turned around. Jesse's eyes were back to the blue he remembered, but there was anger was clouding them. Jesse was leaning against the doorframe, one hand in a fist, covering his mouth.

"Until I can do a full scan, I think it's a neural spike," Adam said, his eyes meeting Jesse's.

Kilmartin closed his eyes and breathed deeply. The emotions and fears he had when Lexa's went haywire ate at his emotions, but he knew that this time was different. They couldn't even begin to control this.

He opened his eyes to a fearful look from Emma. She had been projecting calmness to the room, he had felt it the moment he had come up upon them, but his anger was hard to keep under wraps.

"Adam, do what you have to do, we need to get Lexa and we need to protect the president," Jesse said, "My suggestion is that we get me into a government hospital while Brennan, you guys go to Storm King and see what you can salvage."

"Jesse, I don't think that's the best idea," Brennan began, "How sure are you that you can trust the government guys? Remember, they don't like us. You having that inside of you means that they can and will neutralize you right?"

Jesse nodded. Brennan was right. He was now a target as well.

"Okay then, we all go to Storm King and see what's left of Sanctuary."


	16. Chapter 16

BackStep

Legal Disclaimer-To satisfy the lawyers, the following work of fanfiction is just that, fan fiction. The rights of Tribune Entertainment, Fireworks, and the rest of the gang who owns these characters are still theirs. I am just playing in the creative driveway, hoping that they don't pull the SUV out.

Author's Note-Oh man. You guys must hate me for taking so long, but at least I can say the following-I AM OKAY! Health issues had me sidelined, mental state had me nowhere near writing. So, please accept my apologies. Also, started this as another chapter and hated it, so I rewrote it. Surprisingly enough, it came out much better and I like it. I hope you guys do as well. Also, if you haven't supported ADV films lately, do. Season 3 is out on DVD. I wish to hades there had been a season 4.

Chapter 16

The dust was thicker than sand in the Sahara. Shalimar went in first, trying desperately to find an easy route for her non-feral friends as she surveyed the damage that was once a place they all called home. Sanctuary had to be blown up to save their lives, keep their secret, and in turn gave them their new lives. Now after all the secrecy, they had come full circle and back to their first real home.

The only trouble was that with great power comes great responsibility. They all had their own ability, they had saved the world a number of times, they still had troubles with the simple act of living a normal life. Some dealt, others resented it.

Shalimar climbed several rocks then knelt. If Brennan could blow the rock she stood on apart, she knew that they could get into the old lab. It would have been easier to get into the lab with Jesse's powers, but with his current state, that was a certain death knell. They had to have Jesse calm, Emma was working on that, and Brennan was working out his frustrations on the rocks that lined the base of their old landing bay. Getting the generators up and running would be another challenge, but between Jesse's knowledge and Brennan's electric personality, she knew they would get it working. They had to get the spike out of Jesse. They had to find Lexa and keep her from killing the President, and they had no time for either.

She grunted and found a path to the lab under an easy series of rocks for Brennan to destroy. She raised a hand to her dust covered face, thumbing her comm. ring at the same time.

"Come on in guys, the dust up here is good, and I think I found a way in," she said, "Brennan, you better be ready to bust rocks."

Brennan laughed from their location in the old entry bay into Sanctuary. He had landed the Strand near the foot of the mountain base. Their climb had been slow, but, they had made it to the outset of rock that everyone remembered from their entry and exit to the mountain. It looked the same, it was once you stepped into the cave that they once flew out of, it was a disaster. The explosion took out the ceiling. It was all over the bay's smooth floor, but it was ruined. They wouldn't be able to fly anything out of there again.

"Keep coming guys," Shalimar shouted, "You can make it another couple of feet till it gets really hard."

"That gives us what, a few feet Shal?" Jesse yelled back, taking Pierce's hand as they headed down the edge of the ruined hanger, "Damned ferals."

"I heard that, you should be okay Jess," she yelled back, "Come on guys, you're almost here."

"Jesse, what is this place?" Pierce asked.

At first, Jesse didn't want to bring Pierce here, but there was no one to watch him back at Haven. He knelt down to meet his son's eyes, then pulled him up onto his back, piggy back style. He really wanted to put him on his shoulders, but he knew that would bring up too many questions about what was on his neck. He continued down the hanger, acting as a tour guide the whole way.

"This is where we all used to live, Pierce," Emma answered for him, "Uncle Adam was forced to blow it up a while back."

"Wow," Pierce said, "It's a big place."

"Yep," Jesse replied.

He had grown silent, not wanting his thoughts to broadcast to his wife and son, but the rooms gave him the creeps. It was almost like he had walked into a picture of his old life and nothing was as he remembered it. Pale blue eyes scanned the walls as his memories shattered. The high ceilings of the dojo were gone, caved in with the initial explosion. He walked toward the bedrooms, putting Pierce down to let the boy follow him, but he felt sorrow at the state of a place that was once the only home he knew and loved.

Emma had done the same. She watched Jesse as he walked, reading his body movements as his emotions were screaming at her. She tuned the emotions out, letting Jesse have his sorrow and pain at the sight of what once was. She felt the same way, and the emotions playing off the rest of the group were equal to Jesse's. If she let herself feed on them she would be overcome by them. The groups sadness started to wane, the mission taking over their mindset. They were there to help Jesse.

The one thing that they hadn't noticed was that Pierce had wandered away from them in the wreckage.

"Uncle Adam?" Pierce's voice broke her concentration.

She hadn't noticed that the little boy was nowhere to be seen. Shalimar's eyes grew golden as she heard his voice. Brennan wasn't far from them, leaning against the edge of the wall of the hangar.

"Yes, Pierce?" Adam replied, looking in the direction the voice came from.

"Is this the lab you're looking for?" he asked, his voice coming from behind a series of rocks that were against a wall.

"Where are you Pierce?" Jesse asked, "We can't find you."

"Come on, it's easy," Pierce said, his voice impatient, "I walked through that rock in front of you, Jesse."

Jesse's mouth fell open. At Pierce's age, it was surprising that he could do what he said he did, but for him to be as open as he was about was shocking. It made perfect sense since he was as mutant as Jesse was.

"Pierce, can you show me?" Jesse asked, "We need to know which rock to walk through."

The large boulder in front of him separated as Pierce phased through it. Adam smiled at the boy who now was looking at his adopted parents, who seemed both shocked and proud of his accomplishment.

"I thought you might want me to go this way," Pierce began, "It's a big room on the other side and it doesn't look like all of these rooms."

"Really?" Adam asked, "Can you get us in there?"

Pierce nodded and took Adam's hand. The other hand he put on the boulder, phased it and took them through. Adam marveled at the little boy's strength and skill. The ability was off the charts and part of Adam's scientific mind wished to see the boy's brainwave activity, the other half marveled at how this ability didn't affect him.

Then they rematerialized. Pierce had brought him into the lab he knew from five years ago. In a way he was home. It was dark, it smelled horrible, but he was home. He walked up to a dusty keyboard, blew the dust off of it, and looked at the monitor beyond it. The lab was intact.

"Guys, if you can, get in here," he yelled, "Pierce, do what you can to get Brennan in here, we need to power this up."

The little boy nodded and walked through the wall.

* * *

One touch from Brennan and the lab, in all its former glory, came back to life. The computers were all showing errors, but they worked and that was the start that Adam was looking for. The scanners seemed to work, but Adam ran every diagnostic he could think of to make it all work.

Jesse sat by himself while Brennan worked on generating power to the computers that Adam was using. One large tesla coil brought him the computers, the next brought the lights to life.

The lab unfortunately was still very warm to work in. Pierce, who had shown so much energy in brining the adults through the boulders that surrounded the entrance, napped on the edge of the medical bed that dominated the room. Emma watched him sleep as Shalimar walked up to and sat next to Jesse.

"You're distant," she began, "You okay?"

Jesse looked at her. Part of him wanted to scream, rip the devices out of his neck, pray for his own death and be done with what was going on. The other part of him was calmer, focused more on the mission ahead than with his life.

"No," he replied, "How the hell did we get back here Shal?"

"I was thinking the same thing," Shalimar replied, "I'm just happy we did. You did realize that for the first time in years we're all a team."

Jesse shrugged then nodded. He had missed that.

"You also have a hell of a son, Jess," she continued, "We wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him. You have powers then?"

"Not that I remember," he replied, "I don't think he realizes what he's done, it's not easy to reach in and…"

He stopped mid sentence. He stood up and headed over to Adam, who was deep into the program he was trying to bring up.

"Adam, what if Pierce can phase this out of me?" he asked quickly, his thoughts catching up with his voice.

Kane stopped typing and looked at the younger man. The look in Jesse's eyes was chilling. Shalimar also stopped, the thought had crossed her mind, but she had dismissed it.

"Pierce's doing that could kill you," Adam said softly, "I did think of it."

"You could have mentioned it," Jesse said, "I know you don't want me dead, neither does Pierce."

"I know, Jesse," Adam replied after a few moments, "Do you really want to put him through that?"

"Through what?" Brennan asked, turning the corner to check on Adam's progress with getting the computers running.

"He can phase, Bren," Jesse said, meeting his friend's eyes, "Why not have him phase this out of my neck?"

Brennan stopped for a moment. The look of desperation in his friend's eyes spoke volumes.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" he asked, "What if he hurts you more than the spike, Jess?"

"We don't have the time to worry about if it will work, do we Adam?" Jesse asked, "You got us up here because you knew how bad it would be if this didn't work. You remember how it was for Lexa, right?"

Kane nodded. The young woman suffered from the implant that one day almost killed them all. She couldn't control herself when the switch was pulled. The look of fear that Kane saw in her eyes was now mirrored in Kilmartin.

"Let me get the x-ray programs running at least, Jesse," Adam said, "Let him nap a little more, then we'll get him up and see if he's willing to pull something from you, okay?"

"Thank you," Jesse replied.

His message got through.

* * *

She sat staring at the words on the walls, wondering what they went through when they were placed there. It was a precision carving, the words in stone, names of two very alive people at a time when they were thought to be dead.

The years had passed. The pain was still there, the shock of losing two of them was never healed, and she knew it. The emotions of the rocks said it all. This was a place where everyone rekindled after a great loss. She liked it here, the view was amazing, but she knew immediately she wasn't alone.

"I used to come here when I thought you were dead," Jesse began.

"I know," Emma's reply was barely audible, "The rocks told me. You and Shalimar. Brennan suffered in his own way."

"That's Brennan," Jesse continued, "I know you heard what I suggested."

"Yes, I did," her answer was muffled as she sat down on the edge of the rocks, "You are putting him through too much."

Jesse stopped. He had gotten used to Emma's mind reading without protesting it, but she knew what he was thinking before he even said it. She was also telling him gently that he was wrong in asking Pierce to do something that could wind up killing him. The scars he would give his own child would last a lifetime.

"We're between a rock and a hard place, Em," Jesse continued, "You don't understand how bad this is. I spent days trying to figure out how to get this out of Lexa, and it took Adam's help to get it out of her."

"I know," Emma said, "You understand that Pierce might just be able to do it, but you couldn't phase it out of Lexa, could you?"

She was right.

"No," Jesse's soft reply hurt Emma to the core, "I couldn't. But, I had to try everything. I don't want someone controlling me, Emma. I also need to be in control of myself. The only way that can happen is by getting this damn thing out of me."

She turned to the tears she expected welling up in his eyes. He had been so strong and together inside, but out here, where it was just the two of them, he was so lost. Putting a hand to the side of his face, she looked into his eyes. The pain had a metallic taste to it. He was hurting, but he was also very scared.

"So do I," she said, "If Pierce has to do it, we'll help him through."

* * *

Hours later, with a few helpful boosts from Brennan, the computer system at Sanctuary was up and running on generator power. Adam typed till his fingers nearly bled, but he managed to bring the entire system in the medical lab operational. Jesse had napped during his conversation with Emma and the cheers of joy he heard from the lab. He had to admit, the emotion of Sanctuary had him exhausted.

When he slept, he dreamed. He dreamed he was walking through Sanctuary, but it was intact, everyone was together, and everyone was happy. It felt surprising normal. The only strange factor was Lexa sitting in the dining room, eating and enjoying the meal that Adam had prepared, her eyes normal and her laughter joining Emma's at another joke of Brennan's. It didn't seem right.

Lexa turned her head and stared at him.

"It's not right," she said, her stare making him cringe, "You need to remember this…proton coupling."

Jesse's eyes grew clearer as she said it. Two words that harkened back to the days when Dr. Harrison worked on him in Genomex. Harrison was involved. This was going to get even uglier.

He woke up in a cold sweat. The thought that Harrison was after them was something that he lived with since he was shot, but this time bothered him more. They had broken him, but he was still able to come after them.

_How did Lexa get the message to him, and why not earlier,_ he thought to himself.

_Fear_ was the answer that replied. The voice wasn't Emma's, it wasn't Lexa's. It was his own.


End file.
